Invincible
26 Sep 2007, 10:13 AM
So I searched and couldn't find a thread exactly like this. There is the well known BS character definition thread, but it only deals with BS-specific characters. How about we do some of those weird people we encounter on a day to day basis? I'll start it off:
The Walking Punchline
We've all encountered this pain in the ass in our lives at some point. Here is a guy, who can turn any word you say into a joke, usually a joke pointed at you. They usually exist in classroom settings, especially in high school and college. They seem to have the ability to make the whole room erupt in laughter on a whim, and can be a really powerful ally, or a cursed enemy. He/she can leave you terrified to even answer a teacher's question, for fear that he'll somehow turn your answer into a joke that causes the whole class to burst into laughter, and you to shrink back into your seat. Your reaction to his constant manipulation of your words is usually a mixture of anger and frustration, but showing those emotions only serves to further ensnare you in his trap. It's like quicksand, the harder you try, the more your sink and sink as the room spins and people cackle even more at you. The only way to beat this guy is to be this guy. You need to have some ammunition of your own so when he fires, you fire back instantly. I usually scope these guys out early and collect dirt on them so when the time comes and they step out of line, I let em have it. I recommend you do the same.
The Silent Sh!tter
You know the type. The type that's always in the public restroom, with his pants down to his ankles, not making a ********ing sound. Here's the situation. Your stomach is making weird noises, you feel the pain, your guts start to bubble. Uh oh, it's time to take a number two, and you're not at home. What do you do? You run to the nearest public bathroom, at work, school, the train station wherever. You run into the room, scope out the cleanest available cubicle, make yourself comfortable and let rip. What's the problem? There's someone else in there with you, and he's not making a God damned peep. You could hear a friggin pin drop. You know he's taking a crap, yet he's trying his utmost not to make a sound. While you're going through your repertoire of deflating balloon noises, this guy is as quiet as a church mouse. Wtf chump you better start making some damn noise up in here! You try to cough....it doesn't mask the noise you're making and only serves to increase the tension in the room. He's just...sitting there, with his pants down to his well polished dress shoes, not breathing, not coughing, not shitting...nothing. He's just...there...listening to your every bowel movement. You feel violated as you finsh, clean up, wash your hands and run away as fast as you can.
The Walking Punchline
We've all encountered this pain in the ass in our lives at some point. Here is a guy, who can turn any word you say into a joke, usually a joke pointed at you. They usually exist in classroom settings, especially in high school and college. They seem to have the ability to make the whole room erupt in laughter on a whim, and can be a really powerful ally, or a cursed enemy. He/she can leave you terrified to even answer a teacher's question, for fear that he'll somehow turn your answer into a joke that causes the whole class to burst into laughter, and you to shrink back into your seat. Your reaction to his constant manipulation of your words is usually a mixture of anger and frustration, but showing those emotions only serves to further ensnare you in his trap. It's like quicksand, the harder you try, the more your sink and sink as the room spins and people cackle even more at you. The only way to beat this guy is to be this guy. You need to have some ammunition of your own so when he fires, you fire back instantly. I usually scope these guys out early and collect dirt on them so when the time comes and they step out of line, I let em have it. I recommend you do the same.
The Silent Sh!tter
You know the type. The type that's always in the public restroom, with his pants down to his ankles, not making a ********ing sound. Here's the situation. Your stomach is making weird noises, you feel the pain, your guts start to bubble. Uh oh, it's time to take a number two, and you're not at home. What do you do? You run to the nearest public bathroom, at work, school, the train station wherever. You run into the room, scope out the cleanest available cubicle, make yourself comfortable and let rip. What's the problem? There's someone else in there with you, and he's not making a God damned peep. You could hear a friggin pin drop. You know he's taking a crap, yet he's trying his utmost not to make a sound. While you're going through your repertoire of deflating balloon noises, this guy is as quiet as a church mouse. Wtf chump you better start making some damn noise up in here! You try to cough....it doesn't mask the noise you're making and only serves to increase the tension in the room. He's just...sitting there, with his pants down to his well polished dress shoes, not breathing, not coughing, not shitting...nothing. He's just...there...listening to your every bowel movement. You feel violated as you finsh, clean up, wash your hands and run away as fast as you can.