A Trip to the Big Dick

[Nick_78]

I thought I'd put this here so as to not clutter up your main forum, but I thought as Rapids haters, you may enjoy a review of the new stadium from a guy who can proudly count himself as one of the first to get bounced from the Dick.

I could give you about twenty pages of why that stadium sucks, but I'll just leave it at this. It is probably the worst venue in which I've ever watched a game. Whatever you do when you go there, don't say anything worse than "poopy" if you're an away fan.

I just find it deliciously ironic that what finally got me kicked out was singing "Suck my Dick's Sporting Goods" in Dick's Sporting Goods Stadium. :D

If you'd like more details on why this stadium is an unmitigated disaster, let me know. Otherwise, I'll just advise you not to piss away your time and money to go there when RSL plays.

[Lizzie Bee]

I'd love more details. :D LOL

[Nick_78]

I'd love more details. :D LOL

Ok, to their credit, when we showed up and were in the parking lot tailgating, we did have at least two very nice, friendly guys from their FO come by to chat with us. That was great and led me to believe it was going to be a good day.

But that was pretty much the highlight.

The first sign was when a couple guys went to get their tickets and overheard someone talking about how Barra Brava was going to be trouble. Apparently we were marked from the beginning.

Then they wouldn't let one of our guys in because he was drunk. Ok, he was shitfaced, but that's the first time I've ever seen a stadium not let someone in. When I made a comment that may or may not have included the f-bomb and then started to walk into the stadium, you would have thought I was trying to smuggle herion out of Turkey. That was my first interaction with the local police department.

Luckily some guy in a suit came by and took me to another gate and let me in there.

So then were down at our seats, doing our usual thing, when out of nowhere around the 20th minute, this lady who obviously doesn't know about the vast array of hair-care products on the market these days comes by with her side-kick "Sunglasses on an Overcast Day Boy" to pitch a fit about us standing in the aisle and using profanity. That was my second interaction with the local authorities.

I think there may have been one other meeting between me and local law enforcement, but I'm not sure.

I do know that after we realized DCU had really decided to take the day off, we turned most of our attention to pissing off the security guys. That's when the "You're just a bunch of Dick's", "D-I-CKS, DICKS, DICKS, DICKS" and "Suck our Dick's Sporting Goods" started. That's when Grizzly Adams came down to collect me and a couple others to show us the door. Just so you know, Grizzly Adams is looking out for you, as evidenced by him insisting that I turn around and walk up the stairs. When I asked why I couldn't walk up backwards I was informed it was because I might trip. He was right. I tripped three or four times walking up those stairs backwards.

Other than security, which caused at least one of our guys to be detained and one to go to the hospital, the stadium is pretty much just junk. Its ugly, its in one of the worst areas of Denver and its quiet as hell except when they're playing non-stop techno music over the PA.

Like I said, total waste of time and money.

Oh, and like I mentioned in another thread, they have a younger woman who is somehow involved in security that writes your info down on her clipboard when you're getting booted. When she asks you for your name, apparently "whatever you want it to be, Sweetheart" is not the answer she's looking for.

[Lizzie Bee]

Funniest post ever... Wish I had been there!

[Nick_78]

I guess I should clarify though, the guy that went to the hospital was the one that was too drunk to get in. I honestly don't know a lot of details on that, I just know he was taken to the hospital and that it wasn't a case of security beating the crap out of him or anything.

[Lizzie Bee]

Aww man, you're taking all the fun out of it. ;)

Actually I figured he was probably so drunk that he was vomiting.

Hey, you live in Utah and you're a DC man? Sup with that?

[Nick_78]

Aww man, you're taking all the fun out of it. ;)

Actually I figured he was probably so drunk that he was vomiting.

Hey, you live in Utah and you're a DC man? Sup with that?

I don't think he puked. When they were yelling at me for questioning the authority of those upon whom has been bestowed the duty of securing the gate to the Dick they were saying something about he stumbled into the guard. I'm not sure how, exactly, that led to him going to the hospital.

As far as being a DC fan, I actually just moved out here to Utah last July from the DC area.

[rslfutbolfan]

Nick I think I know you. Did u come to the Republican with us last season? Your post is sad and hilarious. I was hoping to go to the game there next month but now Im not so sure. I dont really look forward to getting kicked out (although that might be kinda fun as I havent ever been before) after spending the time getting there. Thanks for the update and it just proves even more that the CRAPIDS suck DICK.

Julia

[RSL Donk]

Nick, hope to see you out with us again when you're in town. You know where we tailgate and where to find us.

[Jasonma]

we turned most of our attention to pissing off the security guys.

While I won't defend the policies of the Dick, as they are lame at best, are you really surprised that security got pissed off and threw you out given your statement here?

Otherwise I think it sucks that they gave you crap like that. I guess Stan the Man is very big on the "family entertainment" side of things, and sees the Dick as his chance to have a good environment. Security was giving the same crap to our supporters clubs as well, though they stopped short of throwing anyone out they were more interested in cracking down on the Centennial Firm than stopping the guy running onto the pitch as he ran right by the security guy in front of the Centenninal Firm's section. Of course, this is the same FO that told our supporters groups that they could stand only in the back of the sections behind the goal, and were finally negotiated to allow them to stand at the front of the sections behind the goal.

As to your comments about the stadium I greatly disagree. It could use a bit more color inside, but its a beautfiul place to watch soccer, and once the rest of the development project (A retail center including a large Dick's Sporting Goods location, shops, restaurants, and a new City Hall) is completed it will be a good place for pre/post game events.

I'll agree that the techno pop on the PA sucked. When they did turn it off we could hear (and join in) the Centennial Firm chants, which is more than I can say about the Screaming Eagles.

[RSL Donk]

While I won't defend the policies of the Dick, as they are lame at best, are you really surprised that security got pissed off and threw you out given your statement here?

Otherwise I think it sucks that they gave you crap like that. I guess Stan the Man is very big on the "family entertainment" side of things, and sees the Dick as his chance to have a good environment. Security was giving the same crap to our supporters clubs as well, though they stopped short of throwing anyone out they were more interested in cracking down on the Centennial Firm than stopping the guy running onto the pitch as he ran right by the security guy in front of the Centenninal Firm's section. Of course, this is the same FO that told our supporters groups that they could stand only in the back of the sections behind the goal, and were finally negotiated to allow them to stand at the front of the sections behind the goal.

As to your comments about the stadium I greatly disagree. It could use a bit more color inside, but its a beautfiul place to watch soccer, and once the rest of the development project (A retail center including a large Dick's Sporting Goods location, shops, restaurants, and a new City Hall) is completed it will be a good place for pre/post game events.

I'll agree that the techno pop on the PA sucked. When they did turn it off we could hear (and join in) the Centennial Firm chants, which is more than I can say about the Screaming Eagles.
Dude, it's still commerce city.

You can put lipstick on a pig, but underneath, it's still a pig.

Does your FO hate what fans it has or are they just plain stupid?

Wait, let me answer that. Yes.

[spidergoose]

which is more than I can say about the Screaming Eagles.

Well, duh, they're the Eagles :rolleyes:

As for the Barra, if you couldn't hear them it's probably because they were constantly getting kicked out. :D

[Nick_78]

While I won't defend the policies of the Dick, as they are lame at best, are you really surprised that security got pissed off and threw you out given your statement here?

Nope, not at all. In fact, by the time I got the final boot I was just seeing how many times I could get pulled out and then talk my way back in. There comes a point where you just say "screw it" and see how much fun you can have watching them get their panties in a twist over the use of their sponser's name.


As to your comments about the stadium I greatly disagree. It could use a bit more color inside, but its a beautfiul place to watch soccer, and once the rest of the development project (A retail center including a large Dick's Sporting Goods location, shops, restaurants, and a new City Hall) is completed it will be a good place for pre/post game events.

That is your opinion and you're certainly entitled to it. In the interest of full disclosure I also think the Mona Lisa is a piece of shit and wouldn't touch Pamela Anderson with your dick, we've all got our own ideas of wonderful I guess. I assume you are aware of the fact that Commerce City is an absolute shithole and the few areas where they're trying to build it up the residents are actually fighting to change the name so they don't have to be associated with that dump. I thought the venue was crap. Ugly building, horrible seating, and quiet as a tomb except when they were blasting the techno.

Which brings us to our final point:

I'll agree that the techno pop on the PA sucked. When they did turn it off we could hear (and join in) the Centennial Firm chants, which is more than I can say about the Screaming Eagles.

That was half Eagles, half Barra. And the fact that you couldn't hear us proves my point that the stadium sucks ass as far as atmosphere. I honestly couldn't hear you guys make a single sound way the hell over there in the other corner. I thought it was strange, since I saw you, and I thought I could see a trumpet or something in someone's hand, but I didn't hear a single thing.

Yup, great atmosphere. :rolleyes:







Julia,

Yes, that was me that came out and went to the Republican to make an ass of myself afterwards.

I say, if you don't mind the idea of driving (or flying) that far to sit in a crap stadium, in crap city, and get hassled by security the whole time, then by all means, go. To be fair to their security, unless you get beligerent with them, or get too drunk, all they do is take your name, surround you with cops and security guards (who appropriatly have "Dicks" on their jackets) and walk you to the gate.

I might come by the game this Saturday, I haven't really decided yet. If I do, I'll give you the full report. :D

[Nick_78]

Oh shit, I almost forgot to mention, you guys have some serious rep there in Colorado.

When the guys first showed up, some of the Colorado supporters came by to talk to them. Apparently (and I wasn't there for this one) one of them asked if we were as mean as the Salt Lake supporters. There was some mention of silly-string. What the hell is that all about?

Anyway, we went ahead and upped the anty by sending a seven year old over to call them douche-bags. We didn't want to set the bar too high for you guys. :D

[Jasonma]

and the few areas where they're trying to build it up the residents are actually fighting to change the name so they don't have to be associated with that dump.

Actually, just to point out, that idea failed at the ballot box last week

[Jasonma]

Oh shit, I almost forgot to mention, you guys have some serious rep there in Colorado.

When the guys first showed up, some of the Colorado supporters came by to talk to them. Apparently (and I wasn't there for this one) one of them asked if we were as mean as the Salt Lake supporters. There was some mention of silly-string. What the hell is that all about?

Anyway, we went ahead and upped the anty by sending a seven year old over to call them douche-bags. We didn't want to set the bar too high for you guys. :D

Arrgh, talk about giving Salt Lake fans too much credit they don't deserve. :D The Salt Lake fans and Rapids fans don't like each other, that's true, but its less about meanness and more about loathing. We loathe them, they loathe being forced to watch the Rapids players and fans carry the Rocky Mountain Cup around their stadium.

As for the silly string, during the first road match at RES last season the FSL mascot hit the travelling supporters with silly string (no big deal) then threw the empty can at them (which upset a few people) then came back and I believe doused a few with a fire extinguisher which pissed some people off. I wasn't there though, so my version of the story may vary from actual events.

[RSL Donk]

Arrgh, talk about giving Salt Lake fans too much credit they don't deserve. :D The Salt Lake fans and Rapids fans don't like each other, that's true, but its less about meanness and more about loathing. We loathe them, they loathe being forced to watch the Rapids players and fans carry the Rocky Mountain Cup around their stadium.

As for the silly string, during the first road match at RES last season the FSL mascot hit the travelling supporters with silly string (no big deal) then threw the empty can at them (which upset a few people) then came back and I believe doused a few with a fire extinguisher which pissed some people off. I wasn't there though, so my version of the story may vary from actual events.

Not to mention the whiny little bitches thought they had to get a police escort out of the stadium. What was our overgrown chipmunk too much for you guys or something?

[Jasonma]

Not to mention the whiny little bitches thought they had to get a police escort out of the stadium. What was our overgrown chipmunk too much for you guys or something?

Now that was just stupid (and I was there for this one). Yes the Rapids fans were hit with bottles and drinks, and heated words were exchanged outside the stadium, but we were a large enough group that we could have taken care of ourselves without the escort. I wasn't pleased with the throwing of stuff at us (one woman was actually cut by the bottle that hit her, but the cops got that guy) and I think both team's fan groups should make an effort to police their fan bases this season so that we don't have a repeat of the incident, but there's no reason to get the outside security/police involved yet.

[Nick_78]

we could have taken care of ourselves without the escort.


Why do I get the feeling this isn't the first time this phrase, with a slightly different meaning, has been uttered by a Rapids fan?

So anyway, back to the Dick sucking.

If there is a group headed there for the RSL game (and I haven't recieved my stay-away order) I might think about heading back over there. It would be nice to go catch up with some of my new pals.

[Deuce]

Now that was just stupid (and I was there for this one). Yes the Rapids fans were hit with bottles and drinks, and heated words were exchanged outside the stadium, but we were a large enough group that we could have taken care of ourselves without the escort. I wasn't pleased with the throwing of stuff at us (one woman was actually cut by the bottle that hit her, but the cops got that guy) and I think both team's fan groups should make an effort to police their fan bases this season so that we don't have a repeat of the incident, but there's no reason to get the outside security/police involved yet.
The whole incident was unfortunate. But that behavior was not exclusive to RES. I distinctly remember being told to quit whining by you and other cRapids fans when it was reported that the same type of thing happened to RSL fans at Invesco.
Funny how the gravity of a situation changes with perspective... but anyway...

Even with all the behavior on both sides of the situation... Your statement that RSL & cRapids fans "hate" each other is a bit much. I hate the cRapids and think their fans are misguided and pathetic but can honestly say I don't hate them...
Every fan has a place... and it is fans like yours that give Columbus fans someone to look down on!