AOL's 111 Wussiest Songs

[Auriaprottu]

http://music.aol.com/feature/111-wussiest-songs-111-102

'Fess up, pilgrims- you know and love some of these tunes :D

A couple of years back, I either started a thread or posted in one about how popular music had devolved from being something that made people smile or even laugh (60s-70s, some 80s) into a void of cynicism so deep that folks today feel the need to stamp a negative brand on tunes from the past. Sign of the times, I guess.

Anyhow... discuss.

[Unorthodox Yank]

I can't ********ing believe that "hip to be square" is even on this list at all, much less at #46.

[ForeverRed]

Mr. Big? Every hard rock band had a ballad on its records........why single out that one?

BTW, Foreigner's "I want to know what love is" is freaking great!

[Auriaprottu]

Mr. Big? Every hard rock band had a ballad on its records........why single out that one?

Well, most well-known hard rock bands have a ballad or two, but they also have something people remember that actually sounds like what they claim to be. Zeppelin had their Rain Song and Going To California, but they also had harder stuff that everyone now knows. I think the difference was that Mr. Big (and Extreme, while we're at it) was a hard rock group that billed itself as such, played as such, swaggered as such, but never made any noise other than their live shows (during which budding guitarists and bassists took over the first few rows and stared at the players' fingers) and that ballad. It must suck to have all those chops and be known for a ballad. How ********ing "big" or "extreme" were "Hole-Hearted" and "More Than Words"? Those songs were the Achy Breaky Heart of 90s rock.

I remember when they first got "big" in the late 80s-early 90s musician mags. Seemed every other issue of Bass Player had an article about Billy Sheehan, Les Claypool or both. Paul Gilbert's got great chops and Sheehan's a great bassist, but when you get more ink there than Anthony Jackson, Jimmy Haslip and Oteil Burbridge combined, you'd better be playing jazz, prog or bluegrass- something other than pop/rock.

BTW, Foreigner's "I want to know what love is" is freaking great!

I was expecting an Ambrosia tune to pop up on that list, but none did.

I liked "Waiting (For a Girl Like You)" myself. And that's part of the point of this thread. I got a kick out of looking thru the list and seeing what I knew (and I knew most of the 70s 80s tunes very well). I wasn't at all put out by the title of the list, but it did make me think about how much the music scene has changed from being accepting of songs that invoked happiness or even sadness to one that ridicules those sentiments.

[Claymore]

No Leo Sayer tunes? No David Soul????

Bogus.

[Auriaprottu]

No Leo Sayer tunes? No David Soul????

Bogus.

I saw "Don't Give Up On Us, Baby" in there somewhere.

[nicodemus]

Yeah, some of 'em are a little embarrassing, but here's the songs on the list that I like:

109. Sixpence None the Richer: "Kiss Me"
102. Depeche Mode: "People are People"
099. Guns n' Roses: "Don't Cry"
084. Dave Matthews Band: "Crash"
077. Simon & Garfunkel: "Scarborough Fair"
042. The Beatles: "When I'm 64"
020. Iron & Wine: "Such Great Heights"
010. Coldplay: "Fix You"

That was an exercise in me trying to shed my musical snobbiness.

Man oh man, did they nail #1 though.

[yellowbismark]

I have to admit I am a sucker for Annie's Song by John Denver. I think I'm going to play it right now. :)

[taosjohn]

Yeah, some of 'em are a little embarrassing, but here's the songs on the list that I like:

109. Sixpence None the Richer: "Kiss Me"
102. Depeche Mode: "People are People"
099. Guns n' Roses: "Don't Cry"
084. Dave Matthews Band: "Crash"
077. Simon & Garfunkel: "Scarborough Fair"
042. The Beatles: "When I'm 64"
020. Iron & Wine: "Such Great Heights"
010. Coldplay: "Fix You"

That was an exercise in me trying to shed my musical snobbiness.

Man oh man, did they nail #1 though.

There are literally thousands of better choices for this list; the yuppie-jazz decade alone could replace almost everything here. Pat Boone could have about forty entries.

Or to put it another way, I turned to a page at random in "Billboards Top 40 Hits" andfound:

"Home of the Brave" Jody Miller
"Honey" Bobby Goldsboro
"Honeycomb" Jimmie Rogers
"Hooked on a Feeling" B J Thoman
"How Can I Be Sure" David Cassidy

Or just off the top of my head:

"Angie Baby"
"Are You Sincere"
"Bible Tells Me So"
"Build Me Up Buttercup"
"Color My World"
"Diana"
"Down By the Station"
"Dreams of the Everyday Housewife"
"Easy to Be Hard"
"Funny Face"
"Hummingbird"-- Oh Jeezus-- there have to be a dozen Seals and Crofts...

[Auriaprottu]

There are literally thousands of better choices for this list; the yuppie-jazz decade alone could replace almost everything here. Pat Boone could have about forty entries.

Well, they did have a Kenny G tune and Pat Boone cover of Little Richard. Strange how Pat's version is the wussified one, while Little Richard's original is pretty damn testosterone-laden for a guy as light in the loafers as he is.

Or to put it another way, I turned to a page at random in "Billboards Top 40 Hits" andfound:

"Home of the Brave" Jody Miller
"Honey" Bobby Goldsboro
"Honeycomb" Jimmie Rogers

You, sir, are a walking encyclopedia of old music. I thought I had some knowledge, but none of these songs are familiar to me.

"Hooked on a Feeling" B J Thoman

The "Oogah-cha-ka-Oogah-Oogah" song? I think "strange", but not "wussified".

"How Can I Be Sure" David Cassidy

I vaguely recall this one from a commercial, I think.

Or just off the top of my head:

"Angie Baby"

At first I thought Bus Boys (huh?), but I knew that couldn't be right. Now I see you're talking about either Anne Murray, Toni Tennille or Vicki Lawrence, don't know which (they're in the same vocal range, like Carly Simon and Carole King). I didn't see many songs sung by women there- those don't really qualify as wussish anyhow, IMO, except for "You Light Up My Life" by Pat's daughter Debbie. THAT should have been #1.

"Are You Sincere"
"Bible Tells Me So"
"Build Me Up Buttercup"
"Color My World"
"Diana"
"Down By the Station"
"Dreams of the Everyday Housewife"
"Easy to Be Hard"
"Funny Face"

The bolded ones are the ones I know. You hit the mark with "Color My World", but "Buttercup" grooves just a bit too much for that list.

"Hummingbird"-- Oh Jeezus-- there have to be a dozen Seals and Crofts...

Bread and England Dan & John Ford Coley, too- they're in that same vein with Seals & Crofts. I fully expected to see one of theirs in the list, but there were none, IIRC. I'd choose "We May Never Pass This Way Again" over "Hummingbird" anyhow.

They could used Barry Manilow's entire catalog save "Copacabana". Same with Peter Cetera, Dan Fogelberg and Lionel Ritchie, but they pointed out that an artist gets only one submission.

Funny- I like most of the artists listed, and I like most of the songs I knew.

[ForeverRed]

Well, most well-known hard rock bands have a ballad or two, but they also have something people remember that actually sounds like what they claim to be. Zeppelin had their Rain Song and Going To California, but they also had harder stuff that everyone now knows. I think the difference was that Mr. Big (and Extreme, while we're at it) was a hard rock group that billed itself as such, played as such, swaggered as such, but never made any noise other than their live shows (during which budding guitarists and bassists took over the first few rows and stared at the players' fingers) and that ballad. It must suck to have all those chops and be known for a ballad. How ********ing "big" or "extreme" were "Hole-Hearted" and "More Than Words"? Those songs were the Achy Breaky Heart of 90s rock.

I remember when they first got "big" in the late 80s-early 90s musician mags. Seemed every other issue of Bass Player had an article about Billy Sheehan, Les Claypool or both. Paul Gilbert's got great chops and Sheehan's a great bassist, but when you get more ink there than Anthony Jackson, Jimmy Haslip and Oteil Burbridge combined, you'd better be playing jazz, prog or bluegrass- something other than pop/rock.



Mr. Big was no Zeppelin, I don't think they ever even wanted to be that big. Musicians like Billy Sheehan and Paul Gilbert are all around fantastic composers and obviously virtuosos of their craft, Mr. Big was just another project for them....happened to also coincide with what was popular in that era so they went with it, adding some of their own touches. There were some heavy tracks on "Lean into it" too "Daddy, Lover, Brother, Little Boy" and "Green Tinted Sixties Mind" for example. And oh yea, another song that kicked ass was "Addicted to that Rush".

They were a heavy band in the 80's...they went "ballady" a little later on in their career. Plenty of great 80's hard rock bands had hits with their ballads, its what sold commercially and appealed to the widest possible audience. Besides, there were so many other mediocre rock bands back there. Mr. Big was one of the better bands in that era. Not many bands can boast the talent of Sheehan and Gilbert

Oh yea, Extreme was very overlooked back then as well....many people thought they were just "more than words" and nothing else but in reality they were one of the most hard to classify because of the way they mixed funk, pop, metal etc. Nuno Bettencourt was and is one of the best guitarists out there.

[spejic]

The list is terrible. There are only about 20 songs on the list that I would really say are "wussy". First, there are lots of songs on the list that are very peppy and fun - how in the world could "Daydream Believer" possibly be on a wimpy list? Second, just because a song is slow and emotional does not make it automatically wussy. There are songs here that I hate that I still wouldn't put on the list.

Songs I like:

James Blunt - 'You're Beautiful'
Culture Club - 'Do You Really Want to Hurt Me'
Carpenters - 'Close To You'
Spandau Ballet - 'True'
John Denver - 'Annie's Song'
Kajagoogoo - 'Too Shy'
The Smiths - 'Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want'
Simon & Garfunkel - 'Scarborough Fair'
Barry Manilow - 'Mandy'
Cutting Crew - '(I Just) Died in Your Arms Tonight'
Depeche Mode - 'People Are People'
The Monkees - 'Daydream Believer'

Ok, stick Mr. Big in there too. They were a big part of that quarter when I stayed up to 6:00 am every night watching MTV and flunked Calculus II for the second time.

[Auriaprottu]

Mr. Big was no Zeppelin, I don't think they ever even wanted to be that big. Musicians like Billy Sheehan and Paul Gilbert are all around fantastic composers and obviously virtuosos of their craft, Mr. Big was just another project for them....happened to also coincide with what was popular in that era so they went with it, adding some of their own touches.

I thought they were a "band for life" that broke up- didn't know about the project thing. I do recall that Sheehan was in a band called Talas, but I've never heard anything by them that I know of.

There were some heavy tracks on "Lean into it" too "Daddy, Lover, Brother, Little Boy" and "Green Tinted Sixties Mind" for example. And oh yea, another song that kicked ass was "Addicted to that Rush".

Oh, I know they rocked. I've heard and read that much about them. It's just that neither band became commercially famous for their rock.

G n' R was out about the same time, and rocked just as hard, with less chops (Slash isn't Paul Gilbert and Duff McKagan damn sure ain't no Sheehan), and got noticed primarily for rocking and Axl's attitude. Mr. Big and Extreme got noticed for ballads. That's like having an AC Cobra and having a girl say "Wow, that's sooo cute! I love it!" because it's a relatively small car. She likes it, great- but she likes it in the wrong way for the wrong reason.

Plenty of great 80's hard rock bands had hits with their ballads, its what sold commercially and appealed to the widest possible audience.

This is true. But if it had to be the 80s and I couldn't be playing go-go or Police/U2 type stuff I'd rather have been in some Britpop band like Sade (whose music I find tasteful and well-done), Level 42, Swing Out Sister or Simple Minds than a hard rock band whose only hit was a ballad. Hell, I'd rather be in a band like Ratt or Scorpions- at least they made rock hits.

Besides, there were so many other mediocre rock bands back there. Mr. Big was one of the better bands in that era. Not many bands can boast the talent of Sheehan and Gilbert

Oh yea, Extreme was very overlooked back then as well....many people thought they were just "more than words" and nothing else but in reality they were one of the most hard to classify because of the way they mixed funk, pop, metal etc. Nuno Bettencourt was and is one of the best guitarists out there.

Saw them live some time ago. They were diverse indeed. But the biggest cheers from the crowd came for the ballad. Wild, because they were opening for ZZ Top- you'd think that crowd woud be above rock ballads.

[afgrijselijkheid]

Songs I like:

James Blunt - 'You're Beautiful'



please immediately beat yourself until you black out

thank you

[spejic]

please immediately beat yourself until you black out

thank you
I didn't care about the song until I saw the video, which I thought was rather haunting in its simplicity. I liked the song after that.

[scaryice]

"Feelings are for dames!"

...stupid list.

[afgrijselijkheid]

I didn't care about the song until I saw the video, which I thought was rather haunting in its simplicity. I liked the song after that.
nevertheless... commence with the self-beating

[taosjohn]

At first I thought Bus Boys (huh?), but I knew that couldn't be right. Now I see you're talking about either Anne Murray, Toni Tennille or Vicki Lawrence, don't know which

The bolded ones are the ones I know. You hit the mark with "Color My World", but "Buttercup" grooves just a bit too much for that list.



Bread and England Dan & John Ford Coley, too- they're in that same vein with Seals & Crofts. I fully expected to see one of theirs in the list, but there were none, IIRC. I'd choose "We May Never Pass This Way Again" over "Hummingbird" anyhow.

a) Helen Reddy

b) That's not a groove, its a tic or a spasm or something...

c) I'd go for "Summer Breeze" myself-- its the "jasmine in my mind" that gets it over the top...

[bigredfutbol]

"I'm Not In Love" by 10cc? That's one of the AM hits from my childhood I used to fall asleep listening to on my little transister radio. I STILL get chills when I hear it...to the 6 or 7 year old me, that song was part of my sonic window to the outside, grown-up world outside of rural Nebraska.

How DARE they mock the soundtrack to my life! ;)

The first time I heard "Kiss Me" I wanted to be 15 all over again, just for a day.

And "Skyway" by The Replacements is a great song, "Pleased to Meet Me" was their last great record.

[bigredfutbol]

Choice #2 deserves all the contempt we can muster, however.