So, I screwed up tonight...

[raleighsocref]

Here is an example of how not to deal with your pears after a game.
A little backgound. I get assigned a U16 competitive boys game. Crosstown rivals. Knew it was going to be competitive. We don't ever get to see who we are assigned with. When I get to the pitch the center shows up. It is 3 minutes before kick off. I am a little frustrated but hey what can you do. Then I realize it was a guy I had worked with last year on a competitive hispanic game. Almost got my butt kicked after the game because of him.
First half goes pretty normallly. Second half comes. I put my flag up for an offside. He looksover sees it waits and blows the whistle real gently. Attacker keeps going big collision between the attacker and the keeper. They get up, get in each others faces. I look to see where he is and he is still 35 yards away. Fortunately they seperated themselves. Few minutes later same attacker gets tangled up with another player. They go down and then get back up and get in each others faces. I look up and he is 35 yeards away again. This time it is getting more serious. I sprint out from my position to get them away from each other. He jogs up and issues yellows.
Later in the game hard tackle from blue team on white. Studs up to the ankles. I whiggle the flag and point to the pocket. He blows me off. I call his name and give him the hand wave to come over. He still blows me off and restarts the game. Comes by 5 minutes later and says what do you have? I Tell him it is too late. He obviously does not want my opinion.
The whole time I am on the coaches side getting my you know what chewed out for 80 minutes.
Miserable. After the game he asks what the deal is. I try to explain calmly that he needs to be aware that when his assistants are trying to give him information he needs to listen. Sometimes it is important. He then says I knew you wanted me to issue a card but you can't have 20 cards in the game. These are a bunch of kids running around. If this was an adult game then it would be different. I tried to explain about match control etc and he says but I am the referee. I said if that is how you want it then I don't ever want to work with you again. We exchanged some other words that were not so nice. I ended up apologizing a little later when we were splitting the match fees.
So, what would you have done differently if you were me?? I am open to suggestions here guys.

[Chas (Psyatika)]

Probably would have avoided the "never working with you again" thing, as that's pretty much beyond your control. You could always submit a report to the State Association. If he's really that bad, then chances are he won't be moving up anytime soon. Just worry about your own ability and you'll be fine. If he puts you in dangerous situations then you should be alerting the authorities, not arguing with him.

[bluedevils]

that's a tough one. a guy who is 35 yards away from on-field skirmishes and shows up 3 minutes before kickoff, probably is not interested in hearing constructive feedback from his ARs. It may have been hopeless for you to get through to the guy at all.

Perhaps you could have added that even if he didn't want to take your advice (give a card on the studs-to-ankle tackle), he needs to sell the teamwork impression on the field. Maybe some 'thanks Bob, for your help' etc etc. The ref doesn't always need to act on the AR's advice, but he should work hard to give the impression of teamwork especially when he decides NOT to take the AR's advice.

When he says, 'but I am the referee' you might have said we all are the referee at some point. The smart referee takes feedback from his crew and doesn't have a superiority complex.

I don't blame you for getting pissed with the guy after the match and telling him how you felt.

Sorry I didn't give you much for helpful advice.

[nylaw5]

I think during the match you did what you needed to do. I am sure he had some reasons for why he chose not to react in a way that you thought was appropriate. Post match I would be hesitant about saying anything in the tone of "you need to...." find a different way to get the point across that he needs to get assistance, but most people will not respond well to blunt statements following heated matches....not saying you weren't right, but imagine you have been getting dissent all game, the last thing you are looking for is for your crew to question your decisions. Some people are not as open as they should be.

I don't think you need to write anything to the state. He may have had a bad game, he may have had a different angle then you on all of the situations, he may have made the right decisions for the game, etc...if there is a personailty clash just send an email to your assignor and ask to keep seperated for awhile.

[Wreave]

The AR is there "to assist, not insist". You thought it was a card. He didn't. Let it go.

For whatever reason, he decided not to card the tackle you had in mind. He saw you wanted the card (as he stated), he waved you off. At that point, you should have let it go, not called his name and tried to INSIST that he give a card. It's his game. If he wants to manage it without cards, that's his perogative, right?

When you carry the whistle, if you wave off an AR, what do you want to happen?

On the post-game stuff - I agree with the comments that he probably doesn't care about your feedback anyway. However, if I were you I would definitely ask not to work with this guy again. If you have to provide a reason, keep it short and simple.

[USSF REF]

I know that as an AR it's easy to feel insulted that the referee chooses not to accept your advice. The thing is not to let this bother you, it's his right and his butt on the line if he doesn't take your advice.

Clearly, there was not a good pre-game talk as there wasn't any time for that, and without his instructions you were just going to do what you normally would do. Perhaps he would have told you not to give out cards, or who knows maybe he would tell you to not call offside -- but you don't know the level of involvement that he's comfortable with you giving (and that is HIS fault, not yours.)

What made this situation especially difficult for your is the 80 minutes of dissent that you had to eat from the coach on the touch line. Now there are a couple of problems with this, perhaps the referee had no interest in helping you stop the coaches tirade, but did you ask him for help with this during half-time? Obviously, more of the problems developed in the second half, but you were already taking dissent from the coach and then these incidents happened. So presumably the coach saw what you saw and wanted a card to be issues also, he then probably saw you making some emphatic motions to the referee to come over to you. When he saw the referee ignore this, that probably escalted his frustration. I can say to you, if you perhaps had let it go the first time he didn't want your help it wouldn't have given the situation as much validity to the coach as you did by continuing on. Sometimes these situations are given "more credibility" due to our actions than we realize - perception is reality after all.

After the match, it probably did you both little good to argue with each other over how he should have dealt with the different situations. You could have told him "I believe I saw an example of serious foul play in the match and a player should have been sent off for a cleats up tackle. That is why I was trying to get your attention" Perhaps he would have realized why you were pressing the point. However, telling him what he should be doing is not really the best way to approch the situation and you could have probably come up with a more diplomatic approach to this discussion, after all you can't change what has happened, you can only hope to correct it for the future.

[raleighsocref]

I know that as an AR it's easy to feel insulted that the referee chooses not to accept your advice. The thing is not to let this bother you, it's his right and his butt on the line if he doesn't take your advice.

Clearly, there was not a good pre-game talk as there wasn't any time for that, and without his instructions you were just going to do what you normally would do. Perhaps he would have told you not to give out cards, or who knows maybe he would tell you to not call offside -- but you don't know the level of involvement that he's comfortable with you giving (and that is HIS fault, not yours.)

What made this situation especially difficult for your is the 80 minutes of dissent that you had to eat from the coach on the touch line. Now there are a couple of problems with this, perhaps the referee had no interest in helping you stop the coaches tirade, but did you ask him for help with this during half-time? Obviously, more of the problems developed in the second half, but you were already taking dissent from the coach and then these incidents happened. So presumably the coach saw what you saw and wanted a card to be issues also, he then probably saw you making some emphatic motions to the referee to come over to you. When he saw the referee ignore this, that probably escalted his frustration. I can say to you, if you perhaps had let it go the first time he didn't want your help it wouldn't have given the situation as much validity to the coach as you did by continuing on. Sometimes these situations are given "more credibility" due to our actions than we realize - perception is reality after all.

After the match, it probably did you both little good to argue with each other over how he should have dealt with the different situations. You could have told him "I believe I saw an example of serious foul play in the match and a player should have been sent off for a cleats up tackle. That is why I was trying to get your attention" Perhaps he would have realized why you were pressing the point. However, telling him what he should be doing is not really the best way to approch the situation and you could have probably come up with a more diplomatic approach to this discussion, after all you can't change what has happened, you can only hope to correct it for the future.


Good points from all that have posted above. Let me clarify one of my comments though and then possibly pose a question...

When i indicated for him to come over i gave the motion with my hand around my hip. Yes it was probably noticeable to the coaches. I flagged the foul and then he whistled backing up my foul call. So one would think as a CR that if the AR flagged the foul, giving the indication for a card and saying I have more information to share that you would want to come over and hear it. Yes, as the CR it is his decsion as to what to ultimately do but to totally igore it seems well foolish. Edited to add... it was not a situation where i repeatedly gestured for his attention. It was all one fluid motion from the indication to the card to the come here i need to talk to you about it motion.
My question to you all as a community is when to insist rather than assist. A person who I highly respect and trust who has worked at the professional level has said there are times when as an assistant you just assist and there are times when you must insist. The insist times are for the crimes of the games. Calls that have to be gotten correctly. SFP, VC, awarding a goal when it should be disallowed etc. Things that have an impact on the match in a negative manner and have to be right. What are your thoughts on that. Clearly after reading the comments above most think this was a situation of just assist. I also realize that it is a you had to be there situation but what do you think. Possibly the inisisting applies more at the professional level/competitive amateur games than youth competitive travel teams?

[ref47]

in spite of the emphasis that ussf has placed on the ref "team" concept, all instructions point to letting the ref call the game. the ar only makes calls on fouls IF he is sure that the ref could not clearly see what has happened. if the ref is close to play, looking at the play, not blocked by other players, and not screened by the event happening on the side nearest the ar, let the ref have the call. if you flagged and were waived off, do not continue your call; give deferrence to the ref.

review the guide to procedures on fouls not seen by the ref.

on fouls i advise the ar's, you have the entire field for calls ... but, do not call things i am near and looking at, you need to consider if trifling, and consider the level of things i have been calling.

[Wreave]

My question to you all as a community is when to insist rather than assist. A person who I highly respect and trust who has worked at the professional level has said there are times when as an assistant you just assist and there are times when you must insist. The insist times are for the crimes of the games. Calls that have to be gotten correctly. SFP, VC, awarding a goal when it should be disallowed etc. Things that have an impact on the match in a negative manner and have to be right.

I would generally disagree that there are times when you have to insist. You can do your best to make the CR aware that you have a different opinion, or additional information, that you think he needs. However, if he doesn't want that information, you've done your part. Pressing the issue only hurts you both.

Now, if it were a really serious issue, such as the example you gave on allowing a goal that should have been disallowed, if you are certain it should have been disallowed, and that you saw something the ref didn't see, you want to make every effort to share that information. However, if you stand there at attention, or with your flag, and he looks at you, and signals for a goal, he's made the call. Perhaps wrongly, but he's made the call.

Example from last season: I was AR on a U12 match. No big deal, pretty easy game. The CR was not a great ref, somewhat thin on both experience and laws knowledge, but not having any issues so far. Early in the second half, white scores an apparent goal. A white player was in an offside position, but not involved in the play. The CR looked at me, I looked at him, we made eye contact, and I turned to sprint up the field... then I hear the whistle. He ruled offside, and he was wrong. He was not looking at me anymore, so I jogged onto the field to tell him that the offside player was not involved, and the goal should stand. He looked up, saw me coming, and went to setting the ball down for the IFK. At that point, I turned around and went back to my position on the line. He made the call. I thought it was the wrong call then, and I still think so, but it was his call to make. The game ended tied, and I think the team who had that goal disallowed should have won... but he's the CR, he makes the call.

When I'm in the center, I'm always willing to wave off an AR. It's part of the job of carrying the whistle. When I'm on the line, I'm willing to be waved off. It's part of the job of carrying the flag.

Part of this goes down to a good pregame. I tell my ARs what to do if they flag something and I don't see their flag (keep it up), or if they see something I don't see, etc. If I'm the AR and my CR doesn't tell me, I'll ask. In your case, on this game, with 3 minutes you don't have a pregame. But no matter what, I don't ever see the job of an AR to insist.

[Law5]

Not enough information for me to give you a definitive answer, and getting that information would probably require my meeting both of you in person.

First problem: You don't know who you are working with before the game. "They don't let [you] see that." Why?
Second problem: It is now five minutes before scheduled kickoff and there is no referee present. What did you do at this point? Just hang around? Call the assignor? Talk to the teams about the situation and whether you would take the center? Does your grade and experience suggest that you should do that or that you should say "Coach, I don't feel comfortable doing the center for this game, especially with one/no AR" ?
Third problem: No pre-game. If you've worked with this person before, however, you should have some idea of his attitude, good, bad or otherwise. If someone has a "I am god because I have the whistle" attitude, it is not time to "insist." I have worked with a lot of Nationals and several people with the white badge. They have always said something like 'If I'm making an horrendous error, like not sending off someone after I have given them two cautions, I want you to come on the field, tackle me if necessary, but don't let me screw it up.' They did, however, feel that they had to tell us that. Someone who hasn't told you that in a pre-game may very well be determined to dig their own grave, should the occasion arise. Obviously, they were not inviting our "physical" assistance over fouls, or whether that should be a card or not, which leads to
Fourth problem: You took it personally when you got waved down/ignored, perhaps because of bad blood from that prior game. If you saw a case of serious foul play and the referee waved you down, there are three possibilities. One is that what you thought you saw didn't really happen. It happens. The second is that the referee erroneously thought that what he saw wasn't a foul/card. That happens too. The third possibility is that both of you saw the same thing, but that you two are disagreeing about whether it should be called a foul and/or a card. The first two involve perception, the latter judgment. It takes a lot experience, IMHO, to know when to be sure that the second situation is what happened and not the first or third. Consider this a learning opportunity.
Fifth problem: He, apparently, did not solicit post game feedback. Although I am a senior referee, in both grade and years of experience, to most people I work with and I am an assessor, I do not offer gratuitous feedback post game. It is unlikely to be accepted in quite the spirit it is offered. This is not to say that you can't tell the assignor, privately, that you don't want to work with this referee again.

[raleighsocref]

Not enough information for me to give you a definitive answer, and getting that information would probably require my meeting both of you in person.

First problem: You don't know who you are working with before the game. "They don't let [you] see that." Why?
Second problem: It is now five minutes before scheduled kickoff and there is no referee present. What did you do at this point? Just hang around? Call the assignor? Talk to the teams about the situation and whether you would take the center? Does your grade and experience suggest that you should do that or that you should say "Coach, I don't feel comfortable doing the center for this game, especially with one/no AR" ?
Third problem: No pre-game. If you've worked with this person before, however, you should have some idea of his attitude, good, bad or otherwise. If someone has a "I am god because I have the whistle" attitude, it is not time to "insist." I have worked with a lot of Nationals and several people with the white badge. They have always said something like 'If I'm making an horrendous error, like not sending off someone after I have given them two cautions, I want you to come on the field, tackle me if necessary, but don't let me screw it up.' They did, however, feel that they had to tell us that. Someone who hasn't told you that in a pre-game may very well be determined to dig their own grave, should the occasion arise. Obviously, they were not inviting our "physical" assistance over fouls, or whether that should be a card or not, which leads to
Fourth problem: You took it personally when you got waved down/ignored, perhaps because of bad blood from that prior game. If you saw a case of serious foul play and the referee waved you down, there are three possibilities. One is that what you thought you saw didn't really happen. It happens. The second is that the referee erroneously thought that what he saw wasn't a foul/card. That happens too. The third possibility is that both of you saw the same thing, but that you two are disagreeing about whether it should be called a foul and/or a card. The first two involve perception, the latter judgment. It takes a lot experience, IMHO, to know when to be sure that the second situation is what happened and not the first or third. Consider this a learning opportunity.
Fifth problem: He, apparently, did not solicit post game feedback. Although I am a senior referee, in both grade and years of experience, to most people I work with and I am an assessor, I do not offer gratuitous feedback post game. It is unlikely to be accepted in quite the spirit it is offered. This is not to say that you can't tell the assignor, privately, that you don't want to work with this referee again.


Law 5 - Thanks for the post and I will try to answer some of the questions and give you some more information.
I have no ideal why we do not see the others who are assigned with us. Probably because most of the time I get a phone call and or email saying go to field x at this time. You have the middle on first and AR on second. If I call and ask then he will let me know. Just how it has been done since I have started in this area.
5 minutes b/f kick off. -- I had been there for 45 minutes. I checked the field with the other AR. We checked player passes and get the teams ready to go. Called the assignor and asked where the 3rd guy was. He said he talked to him twice and he would be there. I said if he is not there at game time we would start without him using a club linesman and he could take the flag when he got there. I then explained to the coach what would happen. My grade 07 and on the state list. His grade 08. Him - 2 seasons under the belt. Me - 6th year. and no i was not bent that i did not have the middle.
3 - No, there was basically no pre game but then again the other game I worked with him there was no pre game as well.
I have been told the same thing by nationals and white badges. Come tackle me make sure it is right etc.
The foul -- He was 30 yards away. Me, the foul was right in front of me and in front of the bench of the player whose ankle was crushed. You tell me what that foul was about. It was classic right out of the certification clinic discussion.
Last - He did sort of ask for feedback after the game and then became argumetative when we began dissecting the situations. So I said forget lets just split the game fees up and go home.
Hope that answers your questions Law 5.

Edit to add: I do admit that I had a preset notion of how he reffed but was also open minded enough to think that it had been a year since I had seen him last and maybe he had improved.

[Ref Flunkie]

Interesting stuff. I have never run into anything this bad, and I have no idea how I would handle it. I'm usually pretty easy going, so I doubt I would get into a debate with the guy after the game, but I also wouldn't go out of my way to stick up for him either. If the coaches got into my ear about it, I would say "Hey, ask the CR, he made the call" (or something diplomatic along those lines). I'm all for team unity on the referee team front, but I'm not going to go out there and backup the center referee if they are clearly not interested in doing a good job (again, not going to say to the coach that he clearly screwed up). Honestly, more then likely I would simply be upset after it was all said and done and likely send the assignor a note telling him/her my view of the game and then request that I not be assigned with this particular referee again. I've been fortunate to work with some very good referees, so sorry for the lack of any real world stories to tell. Good luck!

[Law5]

Thanks for the additional information.
It makes me happy that I know who I am working with before the game. Maybe when you get the call to go to field X for a game, you can ask who you are working with, if only so you know who to look for. :)
IMHO, if the referee doesn't show up until five minutes before the game, they're on the line when they do show up. One time, I couldn't find a field that I have never been to before. (Mapquest had the wrong address for the field. :mad: ) I got there just as the game was about to start. AR1, graciously, was going to give me the whistle, but I gave it back and took the flag. My head was still on the road, upset about the location problem, etc. I wasn't going to do the job the game needed. I realize that you were in the other position, but I think you might want to ask your assignor for "clarification" of a way to do what's right for the good of the game in any future such situation.
If he's 30 yards away and I'm much less than that, he can see what's happened, assuming he isn't screened. He can't sell it, but he could see it. If he doesn't blow the whistle, raise the flag, wait for eye contact, then give the wiggle. If he waves you down or ignores you, pull down the flag and get on with it. Yes, I know he screwed up and it looks like he wants to dig his own grave with an imperious attitude, but life goes on. I'll think twice about giving him any more foul flags, though.:(

[bluedevils]

My opinion:

As an AR, you can go pretty far to tell the referee what you saw and what you think the punishment should be, and still be within the 'assist' category not the 'insist' category. That's where the AR usually should keep his comments.

If you saw an occurrence of SFP or a really nasty foul that was at least yellow or something like this, you need to make every effort to make sure the ref knows what you think about it. If he blows off your flag, tell him about it at a convenient stoppage. Don't let it go completely. If you can't get to it til halftime, say something at halftime.

Ultimately, only the referee can call it and/or punish it. But the AR needs to make a significant effort to communicate all the information to the referee in cases of serious player misbehavior.

[Wreave]

IMHO, if the referee doesn't show up until five minutes before the game, they're on the line when they do show up.

Is this something that's normally accepted in your group, or even part of the local ref handbook or something?

I only ask because it doesn't seem within the AR's authority to demote the CR. Now, if you had talked to the assignor, and the assignor said, "If he's not there within T minus five, you take the center, and if he does show up, put him on the line," then obviously that works. But though I would certainly be preparing to take the center if the assigned CR didn't show, I would also be prepared to do my assigned job if he does. It's not to me to tell him he's on the line.

Instead, I'd be checking field, checking teams, and doing whatever I could to make it so he could show up and do the job. As an AR, it's my job to make my CR look good (among other things). If I were running late, I certainly wouldn't expect to arrive to a mutiny.

[USSF REF]

Is this something that's normally accepted in your group, or even part of the local ref handbook or something?

I only ask because it doesn't seem within the AR's authority to demote the CR. Now, if you had talked to the assignor, and the assignor said, "If he's not there within T minus five, you take the center, and if he does show up, put him on the line," then obviously that works. But though I would certainly be preparing to take the center if the assigned CR didn't show, I would also be prepared to do my assigned job if he does. It's not to me to tell him he's on the line.

Instead, I'd be checking field, checking teams, and doing whatever I could to make it so he could show up and do the job. As an AR, it's my job to make my CR look good (among other things). If I were running late, I certainly wouldn't expect to arrive to a mutiny.


I wondered about this myself. Sometimes people do run late,traffic accidents on major highways can be an example of a delay that is out of your control.

Assigners generally will place people on a match based on their experience, so if the match is let's say a U-19 regional level match, and the assigner puts two younger (lets say 17 y/o, grade 8) ARs on the game who he thinks are up an coming but wouldn't want them for the middle. Having one of them start the match in the middle could be problematic, especially if the assigned referee showed up a couple of minutes prior to the scheduled kick-off. Not to mention, the assigner might react negatively to this.

[Law5]

Let me clarify my comments:
I am not talking about a 14 year old AR taking over the center of a U-16 game because the referee is late. And I am not saying that "five minutes" is a hard and fast rule of some kind. The use of common sense is suggested.

On the other hand, I have personally seen a late AR demoted to 4th official on a professional game. (No, it wasn't me that was late, nor was I the referee doing the demoting.) He arrived only 90 minutes before the game, instead of two hours before kickoff. Being late disrupted preparation of the referee team to do the game.

Our first responsibility is to the game. Our ego about "It's MY center" has to make way for what will make this game go best. I submit that a referee who is late because of traffic still has his head elsewhere and isn't prepared to focus instantly on the game, he doesn't have a feel for the attitude of the teams, etc. I see too many referees who use "traffic" as their all purpose excuse for being late when they simply failed to allow enough time to get to the game. If you are travelling at rush hour, it's going to take longer! Get a clue.
I am not saying that AR's should revolt in this case, but a wise referee, who has his ego under control, will take the flag when AR1 has been doing all of the pre-game preparations. As far as the assignor goes, if the AR can handle the game, I think the assignors I know will be MUCH more concerned about the referee being late than who gets the center. In fact, now that I think about it, I dealt with exactly that situation last fall, in which the assignor came over to the game I was doing to complain about a late referee on another field. He and another referee had pulled some schedule shenanigans that day and they are both still serving a suspension. The AR taking the center on that game was the least of the assignor's concerns.

[bluedevils]

On the other hand, I have personally seen a late AR demoted to 4th official on a professional game. (No, it wasn't me that was late, nor was I the referee doing the demoting.) He arrived only 90 minutes before the game, instead of two hours before kickoff. Being late disrupted preparation of the referee team to do the game.


Wow, that's pretty tight.

I was the 4th on a PDL game a few years back. AR1 showed up about 15 minutes before kickoff and retained his position. The ref was getting worried and kept complaining about it, saying he was going to put me on the line if 'Jeff' did not show up soon. He kept 'Jeff' as AR1 which wasn't right. But the ref had worked with Jeff before and had not worked with me, so he must not have been confident in my ability to run a line on that match.

[david58]

Let me clarify my comments:
I am not talking about a 14 year old AR taking over the center of a U-16 game because the referee is late. And I am not saying that "five minutes" is a hard and fast rule of some kind. The use of common sense is suggested.

On the other hand, I have personally seen a late AR demoted to 4th official on a professional game. (No, it wasn't me that was late, nor was I the referee doing the demoting.) He arrived only 90 minutes before the game, instead of two hours before kickoff. Being late disrupted preparation of the referee team to do the game.

Our first responsibility is to the game. Our ego about "It's MY center" has to make way for what will make this game go best. I submit that a referee who is late because of traffic still has his head elsewhere and isn't prepared to focus instantly on the game, he doesn't have a feel for the attitude of the teams, etc. I see too many referees who use "traffic" as their all purpose excuse for being late when they simply failed to allow enough time to get to the game. If you are travelling at rush hour, it's going to take longer! Get a clue.
I am not saying that AR's should revolt in this case, but a wise referee, who has his ego under control, will take the flag when AR1 has been doing all of the pre-game preparations. As far as the assignor goes, if the AR can handle the game, I think the assignors I know will be MUCH more concerned about the referee being late than who gets the center. In fact, now that I think about it, I dealt with exactly that situation last fall, in which the assignor came over to the game I was doing to complain about a late referee on another field. He and another referee had pulled some schedule shenanigans that day and they are both still serving a suspension. The AR taking the center on that game was the least of the assignor's concerns.

We talk about our appearance being the easiest thing to get right, and it gives us a head start on the teams' opinion of us. But I think its cheaper and eaiser to be on time.

The pregame really IS important, whether or not you have worked as a team. Part of it is to be able to get your mind on the game, and part is to make sure the details are covered.

I sometimes get assigned with a ref that cannot willingly be on time. For SuperY matches, for which we are required by league rules to be one hour early, this ref will make it barely 15 minutes beforehand. No way can teams be checked in, a pregame done, and mental prep completed in 15 minutes, IMHO.

As to dealing with a bozo center, we've all had 'em and sometimes have been one. Part of my pregame deals with that - I don't really give a rat's fanny how I look, I want to have the game called right. The players deserve that. If I screw up bad, and you as AR help make it right, its ME that is the ass, not you.

[Wreave]

I have worked with a lot of Nationals and several people with the white badge. They have always said something like 'If I'm making an horrendous error, like not sending off someone after I have given them two cautions, I want you to come on the field, tackle me if necessary, but don't let me screw it up.' They did, however, feel that they had to tell us that. Someone who hasn't told you that in a pre-game may very well be determined to dig their own grave, should the occasion arise. Obviously, they were not inviting our "physical" assistance over fouls, or whether that should be a card or not, which leads to

I have taken this and added it to my pregame, even the short one when my previous game runs long and I get to the field five minutes before the whistle.

So far, no one has come to tackle me, but it seems to do two good things:

1. If I do make a horrendous error, it gets corrected while there's still time to correct it.

2. It empowers the ARs and lets them know I expect them to help me get the game right, and that I care more about doing right than being right (if that makes sense). This results in a better performance by everyone.

I have especially liked it with youth refs, which I get regularly as I like to mentor them. It really hammers home the point that they're there to do more than wander up and down the sideline.