A season in the life of the United camp

[Dark Savante]

lol I'll give it a go later.

Anyone else feel free to put one up for yesterdays game :D

[billyireland]

As the team walk out of the locker room in Carrington to begin training on the pitches, Sir Alex Ferguson trails behind and takes a left into a dark room, locking the door shut behind him. He takes what appears to be a tape out of his pocket and puts it in an old tape player. A voice can be heard on the tape, and it's John O'Shea.

O'Shea (on tape): Okayyyy so, you've given me mahr geeeemes th'n almost anybahdy else so fahr 'nd oi got'yeh d'money fahr Vi-di-c & Evruagh. Bu' d'deal isn't ovur ye baaaaiiii, yeh've got'te give me fahrchy mahr geeeemes 'rile nevur tell yeh where me pot'o'gold is! Yeh knoh y'need me pot'o'gold fahr d'debts, doncheh Fuhrgee!?

*A cold silence runs through the room*

O'Shea (on tape): N'doncheh evan chry t'get a centar midfeeeeeldur... dat's me best spaht!

*The tape goes dead*

Fergie: Ach, NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

---
For the dummies needing help: :D

O'Shea (on tape): Okay so, you've given me more games than almost anybody else so far and I got you the money far Vidic & Evra. But the deal isn't over yet boy, you've got to give me fourty more game or I will never tell you where my pot'o'gold is! You know you need my pot'o'gold for the debts, don't you Fergie!?

O'Shea (on tape): And don't you even try to get a centre midfielder... that's my best position!

[listen_up_fergie]

At the Carrington training complex, three days before the Carling Cup game against Blackburn:

Carlos: Alright, everybody, we pick piece of paper to see who play in the central midfield against Blackburn.

(Candidates write their name on a chit of paper and drop it into a box. O'Shea slyly writes on three chits)

Rio: Oi, Fletch. Is my name spelt with an "E" or an "I"?

Evra (to Silvestre): Mikael, qu'est-ce qu'il passe?

Silvestre: Zey are picking to see who iz gonna be zey centre-mid for zee carling cup game, no? Zere will be another draw to see who will play between Wes, Gerard, Nemanja and me.

Vidic: Vat's the point? I alvays luze. (whispers) Zat fvking Silvestre play too much.

Timmay: Hey, Carlos, will I be keeping against Blackburn? I need games or else Bruce won't take me to Germany.

Carlos: No, no. If you want to play put name in box for midfield.

[billyireland]

Carlos: No, no. If you want to play put name in box for midfield.Not sure why, but that reminded me of the episode of the Simpsons where Homer goes to New York.

"No soda, crab juice or kakalash!"

[Dark Savante]

You've both been dealt with accordingly :cool:

LOL@both

[Howard Zinn]

At the Carrington training complex, three days before the Carling Cup game against Blackburn:

Carlos: Alright, everybody, we pick piece of paper to see who play in the central midfield against Blackburn.

(Candidates write their name on a chit of paper and drop it into a box. O'Shea slyly writes on three chits)

Rio: Oi, Fletch. Is my name spelt with an "E" or an "I"?

Evra (to Silvestre): Mikael, qu'est-ce qu'il passe?

Silvestre: Zey are picking to see who iz gonna be zey centre-mid for zee carling cup game, no? Zere will be another draw to see who will play between Wes, Gerard, Nemanja and me.

Vidic: Vat's the point? I alvays luze. (whispers) Zat fvking Silvestre play too much.

Timmay: Hey, Carlos, will I be keeping against Blackburn? I need games or else Bruce won't take me to Germany.

Carlos: No, no. If you want to play put name in box for midfield.


That's just brilliant. :p

[Sapphire]

http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/9282/27485234gj2za.jpg

Rio: You see Ruud, if you head the ball this way. . .
Ruud: Yeah
Rio: . . . when the keeper's going that way . . .
Ruud: Uh-huh
Rio: . . . then you can score a sweet last minute, game-winning goal on the scouse.
Ruud: Um, could you explain that again?

OShea (to himself): Dammit, I have to put an end to this before these guys undermine everything I've been working for, my plot to destroy the link between united's strikeforce and defense, to bring down the greatest team in english football, so that the irish league can assume its rightful place as the best the UK . . .

[billyireland]

http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/9282/27485234gj2za.jpg

Rio: You see Ruud, if you head the ball this way. . .
Ruud: Yeah
Rio: . . . when the keeper's going that way . . .
Ruud: Uh-huh
Rio: . . . then you can score a sweet last minute, game-winning goal on the scouse.
Ruud: Um, could you explain that again?

OShea (to himself): Dammit, I have to put an end to this before these guys undermine everything I've been working for, my plot to destroy the link between united's strikeforce and defense, to bring down the greatest team in english football, so that the irish league can assume its rightful place as the best the UK . . .
Only one thing... you forgot to mention that O'Shea is on the ball in that picture. Ponderous? Nah.

[Achtung]

Not sure why, but that reminded me of the episode of the Simpsons where Homer goes to New York.

"No soda, crab juice or kakalash!"

LOL... although I think it was "no pizza, only Klauh Kalesh". And then...

Homer: Now what do you have to wash that awful taste out of my mouth?
Vendor: Mountain Dew or crab juice.
Homer: Blecch! Ew! Sheesh! I'll take a crab juice...

:D

[israbeckham]

BUMP:D
funny stuff

[Dark Savante]

Plenty of new material for this...

I might need to pester RoM for another chronicles instead. :D