The Bandido Report: second edition [R]

Discussion in 'Houston Supporters Clubs' started by Bandido, Nov 8, 2007.

  1. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Houston is a blessed City. and in this city there's a group of guys that pour their hearts out by wearing the Orange jersey with an Amigo Energy logo in front of it and run into the pitch to win every game. They are the Dynamo, and we support them:


    [​IMG]
     
  2. Dynamogal

    Dynamogal Member

    Oct 2, 2006
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    I already started a new thread for you....ok, well be like that!

    [​IMG]
     
  3. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    Okay before we continue with a Bandido "Why I Hate Soccer" contest at my office. here's an e-mail I recieved about cute little Pepito's school report:


    Pepito is in the 4th grade. It's "Good Health and Healthy Eating" Week at school.

    Everyday of the week in class, they're discussing healthy eating habits and eating healthy foods.

    The teacher asked them to come to school on Friday dressed as their favorite food.

    Sure enough on Friday all the kids come dressed in their costumes.



    Teacher: "oh, Ya'll look so cute and so nice. You first little Judy."



    Little Judy is dressed in a red, round outfit with a green hat on.

    Little Judy: "I'm an apple. I'm high in Vitamin A, I'm high in carbohydrates and I'm just good for the whole body".



    Teacher: "How about you Little Jimmy?"

    Little Jimmy stands up and he's dressed up in a long, yellow outfit.

    Little Jimmy: "I'm a banana. I'm high in Vitamin E, I'm high in Potassium,

    and I'm just food for the whole body."



    Teacher: "Wow! That is very impressive little Jimmy, great." "Ok, who's next?'

    All of a sudden the door bursts open. It's Pepito.

    He is butt naked; wearing a pair of cowboy boots and cowboy hat.



    (The teacher is infuriated!!)



    Teacher: "Pepito"!!

    What do you think you're doing? What are you supposed to be dressed as?!?"



    Pepito: "Huevos Rancheros!!"
     
  4. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    Okay, so I go ahead and steal the 790 am Radio idea about asking people to give their reasons of why they hate soccer. the winner would be given two tickets to the next Dynamo match.
    I will also invite them to the Texian Army Tailgate for the Western Conference Championship match at Robertson. the contest winner will be announced at noon on Friday.

    Here are the entries so far:


    #1

    I hate soccer because people die overseas in quite a few of their games. I understand being passionate about your country and sport, but too many times the line is crossed and thousands of innocent people are injured sometimes killed because of a some die-hard fans. Don’t get me wrong soccer isn’t the only sport where this happens but it happens too much.

    Please take a look at the following link to understand where I am coming from.



    http://www.cbc.ca/sports/soccer/stor...ccer-riot.html

    ReplyThanks for your entry. the games are at Robertson at UofH main campus.



    #2

    I love Soccer........can I still have the tickets


    Reply:You are disqualified, Mirna !!:mad:



    #3

    Do I hate soccer??


    No! But by the end of the game I hate the way my body feels! my throat hurts; my legs hurt; and most of all I can stand the up and down the side lines that I have done in the past with my kids! Need to see a adult game to tell if I really hate or like soccer! Besides it is inside too I think? Right? It is usually either too hot or too cold.



    I have never been to a professional game.


    Reply: Thanks and I'll let you know if you won.

    #4


    I personally hate soccer because my husband watches it all the time… im not talking about just when dynamo play I mean hes on the fsc channel all the time… I hate soccer also because I don’t understand it, my husband is a hard core fan and has tried to explain it but maybe im just “soccer illiterate”… He says that there is nothing like watching a soccer game live but I personally don’t see why I would enjoy it…. I just don’t get it…


    Reply: Have you ever been to any soccer game??

    Her answer: NOPE !!
     
  5. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    SO WHO IS DOING THE WORK?

    The population of the USA is 300 million.







    160 million are retired.







    That leaves 140 million to do the work.







    There are 85 million in school.







    Which leaves 55 million to do the work.







    Of this there are 40 million employed by the federal government.







    Leaving 15 million to do the work.







    2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama Bin-Laden.







    Which leaves 12.2 million to do the work.







    Take from that total the 10.8 million people who work for state and city governments.







    And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.







    At any given time there are 188, 000 people in hospitals.







    Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.







    Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.







    That leaves just two people to do the work.







    You and me.





    And there you are,







    sitting on your ass,







    at your computer, reading jokes and browsing through BigSoccer.







    Nice. Real nice. :rolleyes:
     
  6. DynaKat

    DynaKat New Member

    Mar 29, 2006
    231
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    I'm not at work. :p
     
  7. OrangeCajun

    OrangeCajun Member

    Nov 28, 2006
    Cypress, Texas
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    What if your in a prison hospital?:D
     
  8. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    Don't drop the soap :p
     
  9. DrLudicrous

    DrLudicrous Member+

    Jun 28, 2002
    Houston
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    Whatever happened with this? The people want to know, or at least I do.
     
  10. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    Oh, yea.......that :rolleyes:

    I gave three pair of tickets away for the game. one chick never came and got her tickets, one dude got them but never told if he went or not. and the other chick let her husband go, but she took off for the Casinos on Louisiana:mad:

    Screw them, I'm never giving tickets away agian !!!


    p.s.

    I did sell the leftover pair of tickets to Rey though:p
     
  11. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    *Does The MLS Really Get Futbol??*
    The Schelotto nightmare.
    http://www.esmas.com/deportes/futbolinternacional/677679.html

    From this month old story I can sense the frustration from the Argentine as far as playing in a league that is “naïve” and without passion. But it also shows me that most of the people making the decisions in setting the philosophy for the MLS do not have the heart or the knowledge to be involved in this sport either.

    Is it the teammate’s fault that he didn’t know the Gemelo had played with Riquelme or was it that player’s fault he didn’t know who Palermo was?? Or was it the trainer and coach who emphasize on university grads who been pounded on the fitness aspect and not so much the technique needed to play the beautiful game??
    The Che goes on to tell how it was a travesty of errors as far as the run of play went. and that all he could do was laugh on the field but would curse his luck on the inside:

    About the only good thing he saw in the MLS was the lack of problems in the stands. he liked not seing any police or private security firms. just those ushers, like in the theaters. He might be back for another season and then he may not. but you will not retain good soccer players when they percieve the league to be a joke.

    When the people running this league are more interested in getting SSS than putting on a good product in the field. when corporate types think that they can run a soccer club like a McDonald's franshise instead of getting and keeping the best players they can grab their hands on, they will never get it.
     
  12. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
  13. Macsen

    Macsen Moderator
    Staff Member

    Nov 5, 2007
    Orlando
    Club:
    Orlando City SC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    Al Gore chose the coldest day in a long time in many places in the coldest winter in a long time to say that "climate change" was worse than even the IPCC's worst estimates.
     
  14. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    I just got this quiz, and didn't like the results!! :mad:

    How Cool Were You In High School?
    This is a pretty cool test, check it out.
    This test is based on how cool you were in High School--what crowd you ran with, etc., it's pretty accurate.

    You may want to send it to your friends to see if they've changed.




    LET'S SEE IF YOU ARE A COOL PERSON:

    http://www.sailinganarchy.com/general/2002/cool_test.htm
     
  15. fordfjord

    fordfjord Member

    Mar 4, 2004
    Houston, Texas
    Club:
    Corinthians Sao Paulo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    Why do we even bother... :p
     
  16. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Re: The Bandido Report: second edition.

    *Does the Pope Hate soccer??*

    There was a story in yesterday's Chronicle about the Vatican clamping down on priests getting too rowdy when supporting their teams in the Cericus Cup...

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clericus_Cup

    I personally would love to chant in Latin :p

    [youtube]/v/QJ6sg5HEd8s&rel[/youtube]
     
  17. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Hey, you know what we should chant when Oscar stands with us at Dynamo matches???

    Whatever Oscar wants us to chant, because we sure don't want to upset the Big Queso........do we?? :eek:

    Anyways, I thought we should start to get to know our new owner. as you will see in this video, it all started with his parents,Boxing and a certain Gold Medal. it's kind of strange that between the De La Hoya vs. Julio Cesar Chavez fights, I was always pulling for Chavez. now De La Hoya is a big time bussiness man while Chavez comes out pimping 1-800 number commercials. which only leaves me scratching my head :confused:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sDlVfu-JxuE


    [youtube]/v/sDlVfu-JxuE" [/youtube]
     
  18. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    wife and I went to the Houston Rodeo and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said,

    ' THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR'

    My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ....Smiled and said, 'He mated 50 times last year.'



    We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,

    ''THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR'

    My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, 'WOW~~That's more than twice a week! ..........You could learn a lot from him.'


    We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said,
    in capital letters,

    'THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR'

    My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said,
    'That's once a day ..You could REALLY learn something from this one.'

    I looked at her and said,

    'Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow every day!.'






    My condition has been upgraded from critical
    to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery
     
  19. anderson

    anderson Member+

    Feb 28, 2002
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
  20. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Testing, 1,2,3
    dos, tres cuatro..

    Man, where have you been..

     
  21. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Today I would like to thank the Lord for guiding me into this great Nation where there is still rule of law, Liberty and Justice for all.
    this has been made possible by those who have taken up arms in order to guarantee my Freedoms with their blood, with their lives. let us honor them with our prayers and a promise to be worthy of their sacrifice.

    May God Bless their souls and their families......thank you brave soldier.

     
    ImaPuppy, SenorCool and THOMA GOL repped this.
  22. Bandido

    Bandido Member

    Apr 6, 2006
    Deperrosbravos N.L.
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    A man walks into the butcher shop and finds himself waiting in line behind a dog. he is stunned to see the dog run up to the counter when the butcher yells out: "next" he then watches in amazement how the butcher pulls out a note and money from the dog's collar. the man even notices how the dog started to bark when the butchers doesn't give him back the correct change.

    The man decides he is going to follow the dog back home and buy him from his owner because that is one smart dog. as the dog gets to a certain address and starts pawing at the door the man is peeking around the corner waiting for the owner to open the door and let the pooch in. but when the door opens he sees a women start to kick and beat on the poor doggy. the man confronts her as to why does she treat the dog so badly. the owner answers: "because if I told this stupid dog once I've told him a thousand times..........DON'T FORGET YOUR KEYS !!

    Morale of the story; There is no pleasing people.

    We wanted a professional soccer team and we got it. we wanted our own home and we got it. now we want to have total anarchy in the stands free to tear up private property like some flash mob hitting a liquor store and feel we are entitled to it without consequences and when caught red handed it's always someone else fault. of course the solution against the Man picking us off one by one is for all of us not go at all........maybe this is what they wanted in the first place?

    Odd for a group that professes not to be involved in politics to be involved in so much conflict.

    Brothers and Sisters lend me your ears. you can be loud and proud without the drama. do not become a distant memory of what once was. please remain the unique and powerful voice in Spanish at BBVA Stadium.
     
    7seven7 and The_Ponce repped this.

Share This Page