News: Student/teacher relationships: learning curves

Apparently, my sloppy clothes, inability to catch social cues, and rotten haircut eliminate me instantly from gaydar. Oh, and my allergy to Liza Minelli (shudder).

 

a state's desperation for teachers is a separate subject. I don't think we should rely on that to compensate a person for ruining her life over a victimless (if it turns out to be so) sexual affair. there ought to be prosecutorial discretion as to whether such crimes need to be prosecuted (it is a rather costly affair after all).

 

I am not very sympathetic tot he pervs in this case. We really need to move past this poor little person was so overwhelmed with passion they could not help themselves mentality. How about not screwing minors. Just a thought, sex with a child is never victimless.

 

you think a 17 year old is a child?? technically a minor, but that's just a distinction of the law, not nature. I was being sarcastic about the teacher being a poor, lonely vulnerable woman.

 

Hmm do they pay rent or buy groceries? Get emancipated,

I get your point min really, part of my position is because I am going to be a teacher. I think teachers are professionals who are trusted with an important responsibility. I am willing to abide being held to a high standard to be thought of as a professional as opposed to a "sorry public union waste of resources ruining the children" meme we hear so often.

If part of the price of being thought of as a professional is waiting til a student graduates and is over 18 to have sex, then it really isn't that high a price. If breaking that rule is defined as unlawful carnal knowledge and results in a ruined life, I can live with that too.

 

Wow - you have some really disciplined hormones, dude.

 

In our final two years of HS, it was the custom to go out for drinks after the final lesson on Friday.
Often times we were joined by a young teacher who was just out of university herself (around 22 years old). Even though there were no strict rules about interactions with students outside of class, her behavior was still frowned upon by a good chunk of her colleagues.
As far as I know, nothing untoward ever happened, but I do believe that teachers should avoid situations that make it more likely for them to cross a line in their interaction with their pupils.

 

What's 18 then?

Either the teachers in South Carolina are especially horny or the authorities in SC are vigilant. I'm guessing the latter. I'm guessing that nationwide, there's a whole lot of teacher/student action going on.

 

Let's just say that traditionally the sexual taboos down south aren't as strict as in other places

 

I knew about cousins, not about the rest. I'd whine about missing out on all this, but my Mom signed me up for Unitarian youth groups, in California no less. My first girlfriend was doing threeways by age 14, not with me of course, she had left behind her junior high school kissing friend for older guys who could deliver.

Does that make her an abuse victim too? Actually, I don't mean that as a smart-ass comment, I would certainly say No but I understand there are opposing views by reasonable people.

 

Not that I am considered reasonable )) but it would depend on the age of the guys. The consent statutes in many states are bracketed. The idea being that a 17 year old cant have sex with a ten year old, but sex with a fifteen year old might be legal consent. I think then it goes to something like one over 18 must be over 16 and over 21 must be over 18. There are some marital exceptions I think as well, although there are limits on that in the US that prevents prepubescents from marrying old pervs. I do not know if religious exceptions are granted for Sharia practitioners in the US or not.

 

They weren't teachers, they were high school kids. But she was only in junior high. She moved onto adult guys a couple of years later.

 

If she is less than fourteen and they are over sixteen I think in this state that is illegal.

 

I'm not trying to be a smartass,either- but a 14 year old doing threeways can't be considered as having an emotionally healthy sex life IMO.

Tags such as "abuse victim" or "willing participant due to no understanding of boundaries whatsoever" or "the seniors and college kids do this so i wanna too" only matter to determine etiology.

 

Divorced parents, sensitive girl. She went the rebel route and looked for attention by being bad. I tend to think somebody who graduates high school, doesn't commit major crimes or attempt suicide, doesn't get pregnant, and doesn't completely alienate her parents passes the teenage emotional-health test. But again, that's just one view on the matter.

 

Oh,it's a test.I guess I'd call that a D,then.

I really hope for a little more than that for my daughter- for her sake,not mine.

 

Teenage girls, a tricky thing. Don't have one myself but I've learned from my friends' kids. So many have body image problems and self-destructive tendencies.

Which -- to bring us back to subject -- might argue for for a gender-based approach to teacher/student relationships. No question that female students are more prone to feeling bad about themselves and thus more open to sexual advances that boost their self-esteem. That was the case with my college girlfriend whom I mentioned before, she felt unattractive until her English teacher hit on her. Now, from what I could see, my girlfriend was done a world a good by that relationship, that it was a positive thing for her development. Which is a complicating issue for the story of predator and prey that I just spun.

 

I don't agree that a high school guy with a female teacher is no big deal since he is "almost" an adult.

I know a guy who has had a lifetime of struggles in a number of areas, and a large part of that started when he was 15 and had an ongoing relationship with a high school teacher. Yeah, guys usually tend to be willing, but it messed him up so many ways it isn't even funny.

I think of the years between 14-18, where over time, I evolved from an immature young knucklehead to a guy who a few girls actually wanted to go out with! Gradually kids that age learn the complexities of relationships with the opposite sex and deal with all the emotional things associated with it. It doesn't happen all at once, but over time and through experiences. My friend never had the chance to learn all that, and because of that, had a disfunctional marriage and subsequent divorce. He's in his 60s now, and this thing has haunted him his whole life.

 

John, google Nick Wooster, go shopping, and your world will be rather different.

 

Nobody's perfect.