The power rankings are so unbalanced that the rest of America might just get its wish - California could topple right into the sea. Top Dog: 1 (1). Los Angeles. Lapping the field. They can lose a game and will still be #1. They have still only given up two goals this year. Who's #2? 2 (2). Columbus. Scramble ball comes right to Rogers who connects for a big win. Then gets himself tossed for ripping his shirt off (2nd yellow). Way to go, Sherlock. If Chivas somehow gets points next week, all fingers are pointed at you. In any case, is anyone really impressed with Columbus right now? Well, besides the scoreboard? 3 (6). San Jose. On one hand you discount tonight's win due to Red Bull jet lag and Red Bull playing a man down for, like 75 minutes. OTOH, San Jose was better all night. What's more impressive is two of San Jose's better players - Opara and Alvarez DNP. San Jose faces the corpulant Revolution (away), Seattle (away) and Toronto (home) the next three games. 4 (4). Houston. Lost some gun or something to Dallas early in the week, then smoked CUSA twice in the first ten minutes today and shut CUSA out the entire game. Pat Onstead will be presented with a big bag of Viagra. 5 (5). Real Salt Lake. What takeaway does RSL get from beating up Philly? Schedule looks rather favorable moving forward -providing RSL can be competitive on the road. In the playoff hunt: 6 (11). Dallas. Six point weeks have a way of rocketing teams up in the standings. 7 (3). New York. NYRB can live off its body fat for a while. As bad as they were today, and as lucky as they were earlier in the season, they still look better than the vast majority of the Eastern Conference Pillow Fighters. 8 (8). Colorado. It might be worrisome that the Rapids haven't score in two games, but I think they will straighten that out. Jasmonna will disagree with me, but I still look at the Rapids results and see a real lack of shutouts of the other team. Trap game alert this coming week at DC. 9 (9). Seattle. I couldn't tell if Seattle's defense just quit or if they just aren't good enough. Seattle fans are so full of themselves and their full-on Carnival atmosphere. Its high-time they learned what being a soccer fan is all about - manic depression and the realization that sometimes it really sucks to be a fan of your team and MLS in general. Welcome home, Sounders fans. Schizo Teams That Deep-Down We Know Really Suck 10 (14). Toronto. Things are starting to turn around for Toronto . However, TFC has shown NO life on the road. 11 (13). Chivas USA. Crushed New England on the road, only to be stymied by the Over the Hill Gang tonight. The East Flat-Out Sucks Monkey Nuts 12 (10). Kansas City. Loss to DC is a real ass-scratcher. Have 1 point in last 5 games. 13 (7). Chicago. The ship is taking on water. Maybe this ranking is an over-reaction, but damn, things are not looking good. 14 (12). New England. For years, fans have ragged on New England for being such a damned minor league operation. Its actually gratifying to see them suck on the field. Maybe new the Krafts will realize something drastic needs to be done - for all facets of team operation. 15 (16). DC United. It is alive! 16 (15). Philadelphia. Finally get another home game, then its back on the road for three more pastings. This team has slid to comical badness.