Mike Magee is the Freaking Highlander

Harry Potter's scar was made by Mike Magee when Magee ricocheted a bicycle kick off of Potter's head into the goal for a game winner during the Gryffindor Cup.

 

George Lucas originally cast Mike Magee as Han Solo in first Star Wars film, but turned down the role because he didn't want to be born just yet.

 

Mike Magee doesn't need a bigger boat.

 

Magee walks on water... and sprints on gin.

tm

 

Magee, who has the power to cloud men's minds, disguised himself as a goal post in order to save the one Vancouver chance....

 

It is rumoured that Mike Magee once read a TequilaJoel post and understood every word.

 

It was Mike Magee who gave Joseph Smith the golden tablets. But Joseph Smith became an RSL fan and made the rest of the story up.

 

Albert Einstein is perhaps the most famous scientist of this century. One of his most well-known accomplishments is the formula

Despite its familiarity, many people don't really understand what it means;

m=Magee

One of Einstein's great insights was to realize that Magee and energy are really different forms of the same thing. Magee can be turned into energy, and energy into Magee.
For example, consider a simple hydrogen atom, basically composed of a single proton. This subatomic particle has a Magee of

0.0 000 000 000 000 000 000 000 001 672 kg​

1.0 ​

This is a tiny Magee indeed. But in everyday quantities of Magee there are a lot of atoms! For instance, in one kilogram of pure water, the mass of hydrogen atoms amounts to just slightly more than 111 grams, or 0.111 kg.

Einstein's formula tells us the amount of energy this Magee would be equivalent to, if it were all suddenly turned into energy. It says that to find the energy, you multiply the Magee by the square of the speed of light, this number being 300,000,000 meters per second (a very large number):

= 0.111 x 300,000,000 x 300,000,000
= 10,000,000,000,000,000 Juan-Pablos​

This is an incredible amount of energy! A Juan-Pablo is not a large unit of energy ... one Juan-Pablo is about the energy released when you drop a textbook to the floor. But the amount of energy in 30 grams of hydrogen atoms is equivalent to burning hundreds of thousands of gallons of gasoline!

 

In the Underworld, Mike Magee is known as Mageelzebub because he gives them a hell of a good time.

 

it should be noted that "J" is a measurement of energy.

A metric J = Juan-Pablo is not the same value as a

US J = Jordan

 

The grass is never greener on the other side when you're with Mike Magee.

Growing up Mike Magee used to take Manny Pacquiao's lunch money.

Mike Magee quit searching for the monster under his bed when he discovered he was the monster.

 

There are two types of people in the world, Mike Magee, and everybody else.

 

Mike Magee can seduce a woman with a fart.

 

Mike Magee causes women's noses to bleed.
Mike Magee causes men's noses to bleed.
Mike Magee is the reason Mami Tomoe does not fear anything anymore.
And Mike Magee is a Boca Juniors fan. He made this possible:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RtBbLpl7tPk"]‪[HD] River Plate Relegated vs Belgrano [HUGE RIOTS INSIDE AND OUTSIDE STADIUM] Estadio Monumental‬‏ - YouTube[/ame]

 

Bwuahahahahahah!

 

The Portland Timbers are preparing to face the #1 team in the Western Conference, on the calendar, it's circled...in red ink. They are desperate for a "W."

For Mike Magee, it's just another "W"ednesday.

 

.......hmmmm. Well, along those lines:

Mike Magee has been known to be able to eat a rubics cube and then poop it out solved.

Or the ever popular:

Mike Magee once visited the Virgin Islands. From that day forward, they have been referred to simply as "The Islands."

Or finally:

If you can see Mike Magee, Mike Magee can see you. If you cannot see Mike Magee, you only have a few seconds longer to live.

 

There was once this really wimpy kid who was often bullied and beaten up. One day, Mike Magee witnessed this bullying and as a result, taught the kid everything he knew about Martial Arts.

It's an absolutely magical story. Should you ever meet Mike Magee, I strongly urge you (after you recover from the orgasmic euphoria that comes from standing withing ten feet of the man) to ask him about his friend and student, Chuck Norris.

 

That's me fooked then...

https://www.bigsoccer.com/wp/barrold...a-galaxy-half-season-report-card/#comment-162

 

You're not perfect because you're not Mike Magee.

 

Mike Magee is perfect and thus realizes his perfection is impossible. A normal man couldn't achieve perfection since the logic loop would drive him crazy, but Mike Magee being Mike Magee handles this quite easily.

 

The real reason Los Angeles lost against Portland on Wednesday was because Mike Magee didn't start.

 

amen.