Joey Barton, the QPR cod-philosopher and twitter-bug who was controversially sent off in the match against Manchester City on Sunday, for elbowing Carlos Tevez, was in the custody of California State Police last night after launching a prolonged and vicious assault on Twitter Inc's main Java server. It is reported that he "Lost his cool" after receiving a "Twitter is over capacity" message on his iPhone, accompanied by a picture of a whale. The player is said to have stormed out of his mansion in Godalming, Surrey, telling friends he was going to "Sort it" before asking one of his friends to make sure they recorded Match of the Day for him. Two hours later, CCTV cameras at Heathrow spotted Barton, wearing a Smiths T shirt, getting ready to board a flight to San Francisco, where the company's main Java server, 'Ruby', is located. On arrival at Twitter's main Java server HQ, Barton posed as an IT student on a work placement scheme in an attempt to blag his way past reception but staff became suspicious on hearing Liverpool born Barton's pronunciation of the word "Technology". Barton's cover was blown by tech-savvy engineer Steve Wilshaw. When Wilshaw quizzed the troubled star, as to how much experience he had of Java, Barton replied "It gets dead hot there in the summer". Wilshaw said "@Joey7Barton then tweeted that I was a bell-end before head butting me and causing over five hundred thousand dollars worth of damage to our server using his elbow." Twitter users, around that time, reported "sluggish downloads" and "timelines covered in spittle". Although Barton denied the assault, his case was considerably weakened by the whole thing being caught on camera and his having surgery to remove three capacitors and a motherboard from his forearm.
