English 101 for Mexicans And Spanish 101 for Gringos (Humor)

Discussion in 'Mexico NSR' started by Zacarias Blanco, Oct 29, 2003.

  1. Zacarias Blanco New Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    Location:
    Lomas Verdes
    CURSO DE INGLES DE EMERGENCIA

    Si tiene que viajar de emergencia a los Estados Unidos y no tiene tiempo para
    aprender inglés, léase esto, lo puede salvar en un momento de necesidad:

    Si quiere una COCACOLA diga GIMI A COUC.
    Si quiere un café y una dona diga COFI AN DONOT.
    Si quiere unos huevos con jamón diga JAM AN EGS.
    Si se agarra un dedo con la puerta del Taxi diga FOC.
    Si algo le parece muy costoso diga FOC.
    Si se cae en el metro diga FOC.
    Si lo asaltan en el Bronx diga FOC.
    Si se encuentra con una mujer de esas de película diga UARA FOC!.
    Si alguien le grita algo que contenga FOC responda FOQUIU TU.
    Si pierde el pasaporte, detenga un policía y diga AI LOST MAI FOQUIN PEIPERS.
    Si se pierde en la ciudad, grite AI AM FOQUIN LOST.
    Cuando se refiera a un tercero diga DE FOQUIN GAI OVERDER.
    Si quiere acostarse con una morenota dígale AI UANA FOC WIT YU.
    Si quiere acostarse con una rubia dígale JELOU, CAN AI FOQUIU?.
    Si no sabe donde tomar un Taxi diga JAO YU GUET A FOQUIN CAB?.
    Si esta muy enojado no diga REFOC, solo diga FOC varias veces.
    Si le quieren tomar el pelo pregunte ARYU FOQUIN WIZ MI?.
    Y si estas instrucciones no le sirven de mucho...."UAU DA FOC YU UANT?"




    SPANISH FOR GRINGOS (Para que los Gringos aprendan castellano)

    There's always something to learn or to try, sometimes you need to say a phrase
    in Spanish, but you don't know how to say it, don't worry, It's not a problem
    any more, if your are a gringo and you don't know how to speak Spanish, the
    Smart Gringo Class might be helpful in your learning process.

    For instance, we took from it some common phrases, just try it and you'll see
    the difference and how easy it is to speak Spanish.

    Boy a c n r = Voy a cenar = I'm gonna have dinner
    N L C John = en el sillon = on the armchair
    Be a hope and son = viejo panzon = fat old man
    Who and see to seek ago = Juancito se cago = Little John *#*#*#*# all over
    himself.
    S toy tree stone = estoy triston = I'm kind a sad.
    Lost trap eat toss = los trapitos = the little rags
    Desk can saw = descanso = rest.
    As say toon as = aceitunas = olives.
    See eye = si hay = yes we have
    T n s free o ? = tienes frio = are you cold?
    T N S L P P B N T S O = Tienes el pipi bien tieso = you have an erection.
    Tell o boy ah in cruise tar = Te lo voy a incrustar = I'm going to plug it
    into you.
    The head the star mall less stan dough = deje de estar molestando = stop bugging
          
  2. Aguilas Del America Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2002
    Location:
    Nido de Coapa
  3. KAESO New Member

    Member Since:
    Nov 5, 2000
    Location:
    San Gabriel Valley
    Thank U 4 d laughs.

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