Lampard Redux


Yesterday, at the Womens' U20 World Cup in Germany, comely French 19 year old forward Lea Rubio did about as good a reproduction of Frank Lampards' World Cup no-goal as it's humanly possible to make.

(There was video up for a while last night but it's since been yanked. Just imagine Englands' team from the World Cup in pony tails and you've got the picture already.

After making the obligatory noises about looking into goal line technology when confronted by a group of journalists who don't follow the FIFA rules about asking questions which might actually demand a thoughtful, sincere response, FIFA Satrap Sepp Blatter turned in his custom made luxury Hyundai at the Jo Burg airport, hopped on the private jet which is kept at his beck and call and zoomed his wrinkled old ass - fresh from his private "African themed bathroom" - back to the safe confines of his office in Zurich, where well-trained media seals are allowed to sit around in the press room polishing paens to his greatness.

He knows that in due course the whole uproar will die down to a dull murmor that he can easily ignore. Layer upon layer of FIFA flacks make their (incredibly lucrative) livings keeping ink-stained wretches at bay, so Sepp must have figured he was home free.

Which of course he was and still is, basically, because as noted in this space a few weeks ago the only thing Sepp cares about right now is his own re-election.

As a result, he's currently incredibly sensitive to the needs, concerns and desires of the 218 people who will cast ballots next December.

If a majority of that group wanted goal line technology - or toilets installed in center circles or referees wearing garter belts and lacy panties or any other damned thing - Blatter would be out there fighting for same, tooth and nail.

It's easy, convenient and inaccurate to lay all the blame for this on Blatters' doorstep. FIFA as a whole simply isn't interested, and until they are this sort of thing is going to keep happening.

As it is, this incident - which would likely have gone almost entirely unremarked if not for the Lampard incident in South Africa - likely won't change a thing.