Like Virtually Everyone Else: Blogging the Conference Call

We're done.

All we know is that they're going to be playing.

But then, that's really all we wanted to know.

Have a good Saturday.

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Question from Toronto:

Designated player.

That's not part of the CBA you nonce.

Good God, is it too much to ask that the guy have a damned clue before asking a question?

They had to toss a Canadian writer a bone.

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He says they're going to be taking a lot of warm showers with the owners from now on.

I keep waiting for him to say something nice about Foose.

Ah, there it is.

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Landon speaks:

Giving Garber a tongue bath

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"There will not be bidding between teams for player services"

Which would be, if I'm not mistaken, the definition of "free agency"

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Free agency question:

Dumbass broad. I'm not repeating it.

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Garber says the words "Reserve Division>

Andrea Canales is coming.

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Now Garber admits there may be some details but they need to tell the teams about them first.

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Questioner acknowledges that there are no details, then he asks for some details.

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Question about van den Bergh.

Foose doesn't know. Garber says he would go into the re entry draft last year

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It sounds like they made very minor concessions on free agency

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EVERY DAMNED QUESTION is addressed to Don.

Foose must be getting a complex

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Shawn Mitchell asks about the cap and whether single entity lives and whetherthe league made a deal that will bankrupt them.

"No Shawn, we're planning on going broke in six months. Thanks for asking"

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Don works for the players too.

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Everybody starts out by saying "This question is for Don"

The only time Foose gets to talk is when garber says "I'll let Bob answer that"

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Foose basically admits that they weren't ever going to strike.

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Good God!

They didn't agree on a damned thing!

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Carlisle:

Like everyone else, he wants details.

It doesn't sound like there are any.

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Ah! An actual question

Unfortunately, they're no going to answer it.

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"Humanizing Garber and Foose was very hard"

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zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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\
Oh God, Cohen again.

I've had professors like him. We all have.

We hated them.

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Foose is at least giving Goff what he asked for, a heart warming tale about player negotiating for nine hours the day after MLS Cup

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I'm Bob Foose. I did a great job. I love the players.

This message paid for by the Committee to Re Elect Bob Foose

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Garber answering some question, but it's not the question Goff asked.

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Goff up next:

Process question. He wants anecdotes.

In otehr words:

"Here Don, I'll toss you a softball, but remember who did it"

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Beau Dure!

He wants to know what took so long?

Well, Beau, we get paid by the hour.

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There'll be a "very exciting" re-entry draft at the end of the season.

In other words, the players got jack squat on free agency.

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Wahl asks free agency question.

Garber: Plyers will have greater rights after their contracts expire "but not within the league"

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I'm in the question queue but I'm not holding my breath.

Q & A coming

The main question would be:

Could you tell us s=one damned fact?

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Garber and Foose promise they'll play nice from now on

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Standing by for details.

Cohen babbling like a brook.

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I'm doing it backwards, Ives style.

Either choice sucks. Sorry.

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Unlike the other two guys, he's mostly congratulating himself for how brilliantly he handled the deal

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Is this guy 100 years old? Sounds like your Grandpa at bed time

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Now Cohen is speaking. He's doing a history of labor relations in the US

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Not a detail in sight,

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Will do the following:

"Most" players will have guaranteed contracts

"Movement" will be "improved"

They'll get more money

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He's claiming they're getting those basic rights, which likely means they're not.

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The voice of Foose:

He's very pleased.

A "solid agreement"

"It's all about the fans" an he wants to thank us for standing by them.

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He says the mediator contacted them two months ago.

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He's now thanking everyone in the world; he'll get around to Harry Reid, Ronald McDonald and Hugo Chavez

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In other words, nothing they couldn't have done last November

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More money, greater rights, the "ability to move if a player is out of contract"

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Don wants us to know how hard he worked.

It was wonderful working with the players.

He's getting ready to give Foose a tongue bath

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Garber says about five minutes ago a deal was signed

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Here we go.

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Karen the conference operator is saying something but damned if I can hear her

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Player interviews will be available on mlsnet.com later today.

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Dan Courtemanche:

He spills the beans by saying that they're going to be announcing the details of the deal.

Meaning, of course, that he just announced that there's a deal.

Says it'll be another five minutes. They have 100 people on the line right now.

20 players are present.

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They just broke in to say that they're not starting yet.

Of course, we knew that since we're still listening to Opus 40, but they do like to be polite.

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Hello and welcome to what I believe is Chopin coming over the speakerphone.

It's delightful.