What a Wonderful Game

SPOILER ALERT: RESULTS OF US - COSTA RICA MATCH

(What? The photo? Oh, just a random results shield I found. You know, sort of like those cute puppies and kitties people post to keep scores off the front page. No particular meaning to it.)

Maybe the various journalists, reporters, bloggers and assorted keyboard pounders should reconsider accepting those free trips to the Confederations Cup, thereby missing Bob Bradley's swan song as manager of the USMNT.

Well OK, so perhaps it's not that dire a situation quite yet, but consider this:

After last nights stinker of a game against Costa Rica, wherein the US was not just beaten but, frankly, was pounded into the turf by a far more talented team featuring speed, skill and an actual clue about what they were trying to accomplish (and someone please call a dermatologist because Marvelle Wynne is going to want to have that "ESTEBAN SIRIAS" tatoo removed from his ass) the USA faces a surprisingly critical match in Chicago on Saturday wherein a loss would put them fourth in the hex and staring at a tough lineup down the road including Mexico and Honduras on the road.

Combine that with an early out in the Confederations Cup and Sunil Gulati might have to consider working a few minutes into his busy schedule for USSF business. Of course, dialing Seattle and asking to speak to "That Fat Guy" won't really take THAT long.

No real need to break down the match last night. The entire thing was one colossal breakdown anyway. It was just about as bad an ass kicking as I can recall a US team getting, and it wasn't because they "came out flat" or any of those dumbass ideations.

Rather, it was because they came out bad and stayed that way. Yeah, sure, I know that we're supposed to lose at Saprissa. Nothing new there. But I don't recall seeing the rule that says we have to look like the Boca Raton U11 girls red division runners-up in the process.

Enough said. I'm not even considering heading over to see the comments in the US Soccer forum. I'm too young for that kind of language.

Of course the US wasn't the only North American outfit busily digging themselves a bigass hole this week.

There was also Toronto FC.

You'll recall that they were deeply embarrassed last year when they lost the bogus Canadian Championship tournament, thereby forcing us all to listen to Joey Saputo crowing about how the Impact is the best team on this side of the Rio Grande.

Well, we won't have to listen to Saputo much for a while, as his Impact is 0-3 and is, as they say, toast.

Toronto, on the other hand, made winning the thing and thereby getting into the CONCACAF Champions League a priority this year, to the extent that they held Danny Dichio out of MLS action over the weekend so he could go against Vancouver.

So much for priorities. The Whitecaps handed the Reds a 2-0 pasting, leaving them 3 points down and in serious trouble.

The good news is of course that Vancouver won't feel the need to poke everyone with a sharp stick over making the CCL. They're headed for MLS anyway.

The bad news is that Toronto, plainly the better side, is likely to place a good deal of the blame on interim coach Chris Cummins, who seems a decent guy but who may have to be sacrificed to appease the fans who - I think justifiably - expected better.