Boy howdy, this is better than that new "sport" thingie where guys just beat crap out of each other for a while.
Jack Warner isn't going to take this lying down, no sir. HE'S FIRED BACK at Roy Keane:
"The disrespectful tone of your reported comments further demonstrates the total disrespect that you and others of your ilk have generally for players and officials from 'small' countries.
See, it's not that Jack is a corrupt, rotten old dinosaur.
Rather, it's because Roy Keane - and unspecified other of his "ilk" - hate small countries.
"It is obviously difficult for you to accept the fact that someone from a 'small' country could rise to become a vice-president of FIFA.
Look, let's just cut to it here: Jack is calling Keane a racist.
He's not saying that he honestly thinks Keane doesn't like officials from, say, Switzerland or Luxembourg having authority.
No, I'm pretty sure he's saying Keane is "disrespectful" towards him because he's black but he can't quite work up the nerve to say it out loud.
"I chose to respond on a FIFA letter-head because that is a privilege afforded me owing to my said status and the fact that your callousness showed utter disregard for FIFA's regulations re the release of players for international duty. Regrettably, but not surprisingly, you did not grasp the message.
...and also because I get FIFA stationery for free.
Also, correct me if I'm wrong, but Jack's just called Keane stupid, too.
"In closing may I remind you that a player's greatest honour is to represent his country in spite of the fact that you chose to walk away from yours during the 2002 Korea/Japan World Cup after publicly abusing your manager... indictment that you will no doubt be proud of up to today. Poor Sunderland."
Boy, that's hitting below the belt, isn't it?
Will Keano respond? I can't wait.