Faith no more

Real Salt Lake is going to go undefeated at home, and miss the playoffs. You read it here first. Or at least I did.

If MLS isn't the wackiest league on Earth, you can have the one that is. Luciano Emilio comes back in a huge way, maybe turning around the course of the entire Eastern Conference. Those moves were spectacular! Where was he all year, just fat and unmotivated? Sure made up for Bryan Namoff and Fred putting their brains in drydock. The most nutpunchular game of the year so far.

Kansas City ended the worst road trip of the year one game below .500. I keep saying this over and over, and yeah, they're in last place right now. Watch out for these guys. You read it here forty-eighth.

Hasn't anyone corrected that misprint on MLSnet yet? They're showing San Jose shut out Columbus over the weekend. As if.

Los Angeles is living on borrowed time. Their defense is relying on Sean Franklin, vicious defensive midfield work, and giving up fewer than three goals a game. For the next couple of weeks, the Galaxy continue to have to live without Landon Donovan. Carlos Ruiz is in shape - pear-shape. And this is pretty much Houston's last legitimate challenger? If AEG had only sprung for a forward.

I suppose I can give you a little taste of the craziness in the Home Depot Center Saturday night. Faith and Family night came around again, which made me and my fellow Satanists a little uncomfortable. Oh, sure, they had a couple of good chants, like

You go down like Mary Magdalene

and

You're going home on a Roman crucifix

but

Who's your father,
Who's your father,
Who's your father, referee?
It is Jesus
Up in Heaven
He's your Savior, referee

took us out of the moment.

The Marines were out in force at the Home Depot Center. Military guys make me feel weak and inadequate, so I went about my civilian life - only to be told later those were the British Marines. Not on a quixotic recruiting drive, but guests of Vinnie Jones. I assume there weren't allowed to bring firearms, which was a pity because the guy who ran out on the field needed wounding.

Plus, bacon-wrapped hot dogs were sold in the stadium again. Better smelt than dealt, is my verdict, but I'm getting weak in my old age.

Oh, and the Galaxy nearly choked away the lead. Kenn told me there was, all told, over ten minutes of extra time - what with the red cards, the painful injuries, and the fan deciding people came to see his dumb ass (although I'd pay to see Chris Klein continue to kick his ass), that makes sense, but the home crowd felt every second of it. And that was the only happy home crowd on Saturday, another statistical oddity. (The home teams won the rest of the weekend.)