Galaxy to cease operations

The Gold Coast Galaxy, that is. Ha ha, got your hopes up.

I'm all depressed - I was very motivated to buy a Galaxy jersey that didn't have "Herbalife" on it. And to make matters worse, the new team is named after DC United!

Why do so many other MLS teams get to have international teams paying homage to them, but the Galaxy can't? A team in Vienna took Colorado's name. Salt Lake has teams in Spain that have adopted their nickname, like Real Betis and Real Sociedad. Houston has namesakes all over Eastern Europe. Toronto and Dallas have teams all over the world that stole their FC name. I even heard that a Mexican team was considering adopting "Chivas" as a nickname.

Well, if the Future Farmers of America don't think Galaxy is a good name, then fine. I won't buy season tickets. Or even follow up on why an Australian league is expanding to Ghana.

This was all so, so much funnier before I actually wrote it. Now, it's just staring up at me, floating on the screen like a dead haddock. Well, obviously hitting "Post" will make it funny again. Let's see if it does.