Brad Guzan Does a Harpo Marx

Apparently, Chivas USA goalkeeper Brad Guzan caught a Marx Brothers flick on the flight back from London and is now heavily into Harpo.

When he hit England last week, you almost couldn't shut the guy up about HOW BADLY HE WANTS TO PLAY FOR ASTON VILLA:

“I would love to sign for Villa."Guzan told reporters:

"When I was there as a triallist, it was an absolutely brilliant time. They have great people, great facilities and I could not say one bad thing about it..... I have instructed my agent to go and handle those discussions so that I can stay focused"

Then, just to make sure they got the point, he continued:

“The first time I was there I spent 12 hours with the players in the locker room and being among good people who understand the game of football is important to me and that is what I want to be involved in.”

So after the match Guzan hops on a plane back to LA, and the first thing he does is tell the media that HE REFUSES TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT ASTON VILLA.

What's up with that, Brad? A couple days ago you were like a kid on Santa's knee babbling about a Tickle Me Elmo but when you hit LA you're suddenly too much of a professional to discuss your plans?

Take a lesson, Brad: you know why guys like Friedel and McBride never find themselves extricating feet from their mouths? It's because they shut the heck up.

Toronto FC fans, already a bit peeved that David Beckham will not be appearing in the Canadian Wembly today, are now hearing that LANDON DONOVAN WON'T BE PLAYING THERE EITHER.

The reason is simple: he doesn't want to subject his knee to the concrete and plastic turf at BEEMO field.

He's being joined by Galaxy defender Abel Xavier WHO HAS ALREADY ANNOUNCED THAT HE REFUSES TO PLAY IN BMO because he values his knees.

Now we know all the poor, sensitive, misunderstood TFC fans prefer getting angry at me to accepting that there are some serious issues up there, but shooting the messenger, while immensely satisfying, isn't going to make the problems go away.

Im sure there's some crude joke here with regard to the new DC UNITED MARKETING DEAL WITH JOHNSONVILLE BRATS but you're not going to hear it from me. No sir.

Finally for those of you who are passionate, die hard MISL fans (well there must be someone don't you think?) it's grwoing increasingly apparent that THE LEAGUE IS IN A LOT OF TROUBLE

Of course they've been losing money by the truckload for years, but the current situation is beginning to look to some people like MLS is finally squeezing them out of the market.

MLS is attracting more star power and more TV and more everything these days, and as their footprint has grown, MISL's has continued to shrink.

It may not be time to play Taps for professional indoor soccer just yet, but they might want to keep the bugler warmed up just in case.