Nothing But Flowers (R)

What can you say about a game as horrible as Toronto-Columbus? Worst game of the year? God, I hope so, I'd hate to see what they trot out with that could be worse. Even goals couldn't have saved this one, although they made sure there weren't any. No spoiler shield. You'll thank me later.

The CUSA-DCU game was nearly as bad, livened only by DC's utter incompetence. Not even the East-West factor could save them. It was really nice seeing Jorge Flores get his goal, even if it looked insanely offside twice over to my unpracticed eye. People run down Max Bretos, but if you know his code, he's very helpful. "St. Kitts and Nevis...I believe that's in the Windward Islands" is his way of saying "Dan, it's okay to fast-forward until something interesting happens. In the first half, it was the Gazshjardo (or however you're supposed to pronounce it) goal.

Then DC did the impossible - lost to a Western Conference team after taking the lead. I'm was pretty sure before looking it up that's the first time all year that's been done all year. This is only the fifth (EDIT - not fourth, forgot today in Illinois) time the East has lost to the West - one of the other times was also DC United. If I hadn't have done seen it, I wouldn't not have believed it, but barring a miracle, DC United is going from first to worst. I think it's time to make DC United an honorary Western Conference team.

Maybe I just picked the two dog games of the weekend, but it seems to me like the "let 'em play" directives we've been hearing about in the weekly reviews at the US Soccer site have come home to roost, with big sharp ugly claws digging into the flesh of the game. The game is not well-served by ninety minutes of bumper cars in the midfield. It's a tedious, unwatchable joke.

At least in the games I saw. Maybe the other games were Thrillsville. Maybe tomorrow's game will replicate the Superliga game from last year. Or maybe I should just watch the Serie A showdown tomorrow morning instead.