Not a Baptism of Fire

1871
Riot
Blues
Stinking Onions
Massacre
Union
Progress
Towers
Red Stars
Wind

Those are the choices for the Chicago WPS team name. This is the stupid place to vote. If you intend to be a fan of the team, the intelligent place to vote would be here.

I suppose I could commute to see games on weekends. In theory, Los Angeles will have a WPS team, but right now the only team name they're suggesting is the Website Placeholders.

If ever a nickname poll doubled as a Rorschach test, then this one is it. Your choice says a lot more about you than the team. Miss the WUSA? "Progress" or "Union." Staid football traditionalist? Have some "Blues" or "1871." Believe nicknames should first, do no harm? "Red Stars" or "Towers." Afraid your little Brianna is becoming to much of a femme? Take her to see the "Riot" or the "Massacre."

I think Peter Wilt is channelling his inner Bill Veeck, and is just looking for an excuse to run with "Stinking Onions." At the very least, it would get some cheap publicity of the "Columbus Xoggz" sort. It's all terribly Nickelodeon/Backyard Soccer, but the sport still has this "soccer is good for you, so eat your spinach" vibe for whatever reason. Jamie Trecker will mock the league anyway, but at least he couldn't say WPS was taking itself too seriously.

I should start a "Name the non-existent LA WPS team" contest, but the only name I have so far is the "Dalai Mamas," which is a joke that would take way, way too long to explain.