David and the Gals World Tour 2008

It's hardly a mystery why SUM is busily scheduling Galaxy preseason games in Hawaii, Seoul, Shanghai and Hong Kong.

This shameless pimping out - excuse me, I mean featuring of - David Beckham is probably inevitable. Aside from the usual profit motive, I'm sure the league justifies this circus by claiming that it "raises awareness" of MLS or some such rubbish.

(And we can only say "Well, what did you expect?" when Beckham delivers "delightful" balls in that Carlos Ruiz sends "high and wide".)

What I don't understand is the "logic" of playing the guy for 90 minutes in meaningless dog and pony shows at this point in the year. Are they trying to get him hurt for some reason?

And as an MLS fan I can only hang my head in shame when a tied exhibition match goes to PK's and Beckham is the only member of the Galaxy who manages to convert a kick while the KOREAN KEEPER SAVES THE OTHER FOUR

Excuse me? Yes, you read that right.

So aside from embarassing the league with ineptitude from the PK spot, I'm not sure this whole deal is working out the way SUM had planned it.

The Pan-Pacific-A-Palooza in Hawaii drew such disappointing crowds that it seems unlikely that it will ever be held again. Newly clean-shaven Commissioner Don Garber rather huffily commented that if this is the best those ungrateful Hawaiians can do then they needn't expect a return engagement.

The expenses involved in dragging those four teams that far are enormous, and if - as seems likely - the Japanese and Australian teams were playing for a flat fee plus expenses rather than a percentage of the gate, it's entirely possible that SUM/MLS actually lost money on the thing.

(There's a joke in there someplace about Japanese pilots finding Hawaii, but I'm not touching it. Be my guest though.)

Then they moved on to Korea, where they booked the 68,000+ seat Seoul World Cup Stadium but could only sell about half the available tickets. That's a long ways from terrible, but again, I'll bet they were expecting better.

Maybe the next couple of games in the David and The Gals World Tour 2008 (they had roadie jackets made) will turn out a little better, but as of now, it does not appear to be either a financial or an artistic success.