HOT RUMOR - MLS to announce Philadelphia or St. Louis as potential expansion candidate

Philadelphia, huh? Wow. Did NOT see that coming.

Philadelphians have booed Santa Claus and Mike Schmidt, but never Landon Donovan. That disorder of the universe will be rectified as of opening day in 2010, in what absolutely should but almost certainly will not be called W.C. Field. (Could they sneak it in, and call it the Dukenfield? I suppose not.)

Now only Baltimore remains to complete the entire set of Atlantic Seaboard hatred, but most of the key components are now here. Not only are the new fans unusually vocal and proudly unpleasant, so are all of the old ones. (Revolution fans, for the moment, have earned a reputation as classy, likeable, stoic supporters. Once the Revs win a championship or two, and their dumber brethren and sistren amongst Patriarchs and Redd Foxx supporters flollop their way onto the bandwagon, then New England fans in MLS will become something NFL and MLB fans would recognize, and the MLS Eastern Conference will take its rightful place as the American sports equivalent of the Mos Eisley spaceport bar on pub quiz night.)

Ideally, these teams would all complete their own stadiae, but once they do, the league will have an economic base among fans without needing to import players like David Beckham. (Not that the league will stop. I wonder which MLS team will inflict Ronaldo on themselves?) MLS has made it very well so far with two of its bigger teams providing shockingly little as far as stadium revenue, DC and New York. With stadiums there, and plenty of delightfully hateful local matches, it will be as if the league finally fixed a couple of misfiring pistons.

I still want St. Louis in the league, especially if the latest whispers of new investors and such pan out. As of today, their price tag just went up to the tune of ten million, so I'm happy they're apparently not just taking their ball bags and sulking at Rams games.

But that won't stop us from speculating.

The frontrunner has to be, of course, the Philadelphia Constitutional Convention or the Philadelphia Declaration of Independence. But maybe we should think outside the box, and consider less obvious names.

Wait, no, we shouldn't. We're not fans of the team, we're not the owners, and the names we come up are always terrible.

However - Public Enemy SC. They can play at the Terrordome. "It takes a nation of millions to find a left back!"

Huh? Huh? You LOVE it, right? Yeah, you love it.